I got the message today that I have been chosen for some team of fellow lonely drifters for Wednesday bowling. I have no idea who they are but have been told to show up next Wednesday with three dollars for shoes. Seems a bit steep to rent pre-worn shoes for a couple hours. Someone is living high off these 'shoe profits' in Costa Rica I just know. The 'shoe rental Kingpin' will be exposed. Well, let's see how I bowl first. Keep those scores high and he will have to let me live - until I buy MY OWN bowling shoes. Yeh, you heard me.
I knew a guy in University who was so proud that he was able to steal a pair of shoes from the bowling alley like he had shoplifted Air Jordan's from 'Payless'. He totally planned to wear them out on the weekend until we reminded him why they look the way they do - so that people who steal them get outed in public as bowling shoe thieves. It's harder to steal a Big Mac and fries from a baby (I know, I have done it - now THAT is a terrific 60 second story I have written about before) than a pair of bowling shoes. Not like they have a tag on them that beeps when you go out the door. But can you imagine? The looks you would get? The looks of pity?
So stay tuned for my adventures at the lanes. This will be fun, trust me. I make you laugh sometimes, right? That is until you leave me with the harsh slap in the testicles that is the UNFOLLOW. Yeh, I know, what you will say but you all know it takes me about a week to recover from the pain.
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13 comments:
Hope you have a blast. Can't wait for the tales to follow.
Ha! My one pathetic act of teenage "rebellion" was stealing a pair of bowling shoes. I loved those things.
If they're anything like the ones at our local bowling alley they're one step up from clown shoes.
Oh, BTW: If you've never bowled before, the next day the big muscles in your legs will hurt like hell. But the pain will go away in about two days. Three tops.
Have fun, my friend!
They do have a good look - that patent leather. And they are made to last. Did you wear your's 'out' and did you get busted, Katie? Or did you just counter accesorize just so you didn't get found out. Didn't think I knew about 'counter accesorizing' did you? How can anyone unfollow me after learning that??
M.D., I am hurt that you would think I haven't been doing deep knee bends all day long in training. You know me and the training I do for my battle with the tentacled menace - then again I am usually doing the strangling motion or the hack and slash maneuver so you may be right to warn me. Thanks for looking out for a brother.
You just keep slapping your own testicles. I can't wait to hear about bowling night. BTW I think for many bowlers a "harsh slap in the testicles" is a warm up for sports.
Whatever gets the ball to the pins.
I proudly wore them out all the time. They were maroon and navy blue and were full of good luck. But I realized very quickly that they suck when it rains. I was outed but I didn't care. Swiping them made me feel all puffed up and cool.
Look at you getting all gansta girl with your wet shoes.
Well, you know, that's just how I roll.
I wonder if there will be a lot of Big Lebowski moments? :P
Well it is only five pins so I doubt it but I will try to introduce 'The Dude'.
This should be fun! I used to love bowling. Back in the day, I bowled in a league where about half the people would meet in the parking lot before hand to get high.
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