YAAAA!!! I Am Rich Bitches

Mr Mahmood Ibrahim has offered me the opportunity to share in 10.5 million dollars. Looks like I will be abandoning this humdrum existence, bitches. I don't need to be nice to anyone ever again because I am RICH RICH RICH.

My new bestest buddy Mahmood has chosen ME (even though he has never met me) to be his foreign agent in the most important money transfer in the world from the most unstable banking system on the planet. How did I ever get so lucky?

Who knew that this angel would fall from the Heaven to help BOTH our families. Me here in Canada and he on a pirate ship off the coast of Somalia. Who knew they had wifi?

I know this is legit because of the professional nature of the email that was sent me. Apparantly I am on a mailing list for life changing opportunities because this is not the first time I have been made such an offer. Mahmood was just the first one to make me feel the love.

Mahmood not only THANKED me but he gave me his BEST REGARDS. That is validation PLUS reassurance. I feel nothing but love from my brother from a darker mother. It's like I am getting the chance to make up for centuries of colonial exploitation by helping this one enterprising young man who only wants to have a better future for him and his family and his village and his goats and his goat's village.

I believe in this kid. I like his moxie! He is so cool that he doesn't even follow the rules of grammar. Only losers start their sentences with capital letters is his motto. Proper sentence structure is so 'DULT, man. Fight the power!

I hope he will not be upset that I didn't keep all this TOP SECRET like he asked me too. I just was too excited by my good fortune that I had to share with you all.

I am pretty confident this will work out great for everyone involved. I have been assured that I have nothing to worry about because of a DOCUMENT that I will have in my possession.

I really need to get on this before someone else snaps it up.


Greetings From Mr Mahmood Ibrahim,

Dear Friend,

i need your kind attention. I will be very glad if you do assist me to relocate this sum of ( US$10.5M ) to your bank account for the benefit of our both families.

only i cannot operate it alone without using a Foreigner who will stand as a beneficiary to the money, that is why i decided to contact you in a good manner to assist me and also to share the benefit together with me.

for the sharing of the fund 50/50 base on the fact that it is two man business
note that you are not taking any risk because there will be a legal back up document as well which will back the money up into your bank account there in your country

all i need from you now is to indicating your interest and I will send you the full details on how the business will be executed.

Please keep this proposal as a top secret Fill this information.



(1) YOUR FULL NAME................................
(2) YOUR AGE AND SEX............................
(3) YOUR CONTACT ADDRESS..................
(4) YOUR TEL AND FAX NUMBER..............
(5) YOUR COUNTRY OF ORIGIN..................

Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Thanks & Best Regards,
Mr. Mahmood Ibrahim,

I think the first person I am going to call after I get my money is Topanga. She was always sweet on me and I want to show here I didn't turn out to be a loser.