Friday TV Times

I spend a good half hour looking for a large hi res cast photo of the actors who star in the ABC hit show, 'Modern Family'. Once again they took a theme and found an interesting way to represent each character within that theme. This tradition is fantastic and I wish there was more of this kind of creative media around for the fans. Unfortunately it's more work than seems worth it to the networks and creative teams so I appreciate it when 'effort' goes into keeping a program fresh and funny and something I plan my pathetic life around. When was the last time you could call a show 'appointment television'.

I gotta give it to 'Modern Family' which is going into it's third season but feels as comfortable as a show you've loved for twice that long. They have such a great rhythm and flow because everyone on the caste gets good lines. Maximum story impact with each line and look.

I love the way this show combines bold face lies with the reaction of the telling of the lie as it's reflected on the handheld camera. Again, a perfect style for this kind of 'documentary' situation comedy.

For example - Watch Claire answer ANY question when she is on camera with Phil. Her facial expressions always give away the fact that she is telling him (and us) what she thinks we want to hear not what she actually believes and certainly never the truth.

Sophia Vegera takes crazy Latin women stereotypes over the top but it never feels like a caricature. She's a pistol and proves what I have always known about beautiful women like her character - they are a blessing and a curse and always hard work. She may be a trophy wife but Jay has to EARN that prize every single damn day of his life.

I love the way Jay has found an ally in Manny who, for me, is the heart of this show. Watching how Jay defends his parenting of Manny against Manny's father who is a deadbeat but who Manny thinks is Superman is both tender and deeply funny.

Jay - "Yeh, he's Superman all right. The only thing he and Superman have in common is that they are both in this country illegally."

This shit hits me where I live, people.


This summer's miserable excuse for a reality program, 'Big Brother', was cast with the most incredibly stupid people than I have ever seen on TV. The challenges all involves the housemates, in shorts and tank tops, having to move through some sticky goop to win some bullshit rewards. It all felt scripted and forced with some of the most untelligenic people. Shelly reminded me of an old catchers mitt that got left in the sun all summer. That was NOT an attractive woman.

You have a model that looks like the twin of Olivia Wilde and you have her eliminated in the second week? You make up the fucking rules. You could have kept her if you cared about entertaining me. You already don't have integrity so please stop pretending that you do because it get in the way of me enjoying the pablum that you are feeding me.

They repeat the same shit over and over again - how this week the HOH or POV is so important and how they never told a lie in the house. Have you ever WATCHED the game you are playing?? It's designed so you have to lie and cheat and steal and manipulate people to win the money.

I hear the same people say variation on ONE FUCKING SENTENCE for a half hour and I am ready to kill myself.

Each character was more loathsome than the next with even a good guy (Jeff) coming back to the game (for the second time) and turning out to be the bully and entitled jerk we were all convinced he WASN'T.

You know I am hating a show when I want to slap sweet and wonderful Jordan who is just about the dumbest but cutest girl you will ever see. She is all America is one person. Come to think of it, her and Jeff really are AMERICA'S COUPLE. I should be enjoying that fact but I am not.

Rachel - dead to me. Will not discuss this person with anyone. Don't need to hear any bullshit argument as to why she is not a ditch pig. If I could murder ONE PERSON in all of history, Hitler would be second after Rachel. I hate her that much. I spent two summers with the most repulsive person on the planet and her screechy voice and the way she laughs - OMFG - it's the opposite of music. I hate her so much that it's not even fun to watch her suffer because even her suffering is annoying and off-putting. She just brings out the worst in me. God bless you, television.


'Hell's Kitchen' - another group of repulsive human beings. Elise is just a brat who confuses tough with inflexible and independence with selfishness. I know who I want to win but it doesn't matter.

AGAIN it was not a fun season. Some of the challenges were fun but the surprises and drama have long been rung out of this wet towel. I saw in a British tabloid the other day that the 'little person' version of Gordon Ramsey was eaten by a badger. Now THAT is a Gordon Ramsey show I would watch.

I am done with most all reality TV. I am going to go out on this season of SURVIVOR which is the show I started my unhealthy relationship with reality TV with. I enjoyed it all for most of the time.

I know this will be an occasion for some of you gloat and get self righteous and say you NEVER would stoop so low as to watch reality TV. Well you missed out on some cool stuff just to be able to say that and I don't think the trade was worth it. Ask anyone who REALLY likes TV and they will tell you that the SHARED experience is the best part of television.