Here's A Story For You, Pinty's

 

Dear Pinty's

 

I will never fall in love with your product. You make chicken wings and nothing else. You promise a pub experience and provide all the parts but your wings are average. Nothing special. And I hate that you sponsor curling on TV. You are putting 4 million into a dozen events over the next two years. You want to be a major player in the curling sponsorship game. I get that. What I don't get is where your money came from? I feel like you are laundering Russian drug money through my beloved sport of curling. No way you are making that kind of money from selling ONE product of wings.

 

You show ONE commercial a dozen times over during each game televised and that makes me insane. The commercial is annoying and never shows ANYONE eating a chicken wing. They may hold the chicken wing and cheer with the chicken wing but they never EAT the chicken wing.

 

Then you made another commercial showing team Jacobs AT A FREAKIN TABLE and they as well DO NOT EAT the chicken wings. They stare at the plate and smile like they have never seen food in their life - certainly they have never seen such magical chicken wings to judge by their reaction. Who is making your advertising decisions. You are a food product...show people ENJOYING YOUR FREAKING FOOD!!

 

So today I see this jpeg and I want to puke all over Pinty's and their 'contest'. I have to praise your stupid product just for THE CHANCE to win a SINGLE box of them? Why don't I just enter a contest to get kicked in the balls? I know my reward will be greater.

 

Love, Calvin