San Andreas (2015)

Big, loud and dumb. That is how I like my disaster movies. Add the Rock to that mix and you have the recipe for success. I of course believe NONE of the science at work here but it's a fun film that takes disaster to another level...a more personal level as it focusses on only one man and his family. In that way it's a nearly bloodless disaster film.

3D car crashes are not how I want to start my day or this movie. Very intense. The Rock is the perfect hero to inject into this situation, however. He's just this short of being an actual superhero so I believe all his daring last minute rescues he performs. He can outfly, outdrive, outswim, and outrun, any natural disaster. It's fun knowing the whole time that he is indestructible. He will live to the end of the movie and nothing can stop that story arc. Therefor by association, his family and friends will be safe.

The whole family drama could have been excised but then where is the redemption? He can put his family back together while the world is coming apart around them. A little to on the nose? Happily the film spends as little time on the divorced father aspects as possible.

Imagine earth tremors near a dam. Do you think the dam will be able to stand up to the punishment or will it be the first impressive disaster related special effect of the picture? Will the flood waters be released?? Will the town below the dam be destroyed?

Is Bismark a herring?

I love how everything here is so last minute.  If you are a minor character then all I can tell you is that you will ALMOST make it when you run from debris. In some cases you will even die bravely but die you will. You will die so badly that they will never find your body unless you wash up on some distant shore five decades from now.

Alexandra Daddario (her of the hypnotic eyes) is gorgeous as ever and I can watch her wet t-shirt glisten in the post earthquake sun all day long. Hey, I didn't cast her. I just am enjoying my movie here.

Why does EVERYONE the Rock calls on the phone suddenly get hit with an apartment destroying earthquake and aftershock just when they are leaving a rooftop parking lot?. Here he gets to save his ex-wife. No way he can fail because she can run fast enough across flying debris to reach the rescue helicopter. Now that is just spunky. Now that he has saved the wife, he can now go get the daughter and her friends so they finally can be a family. No matter who else needs saving, the Rock only has that one mission and that gives the movie SOME focus. I only rolled my eyes at the coincidences a few times.

But we are not here for story, are we? You just want to know if the effects live up to the hype. I am happy to say that they do. Many times I watched with my mouth wide opened, amazed at how all the destruction never stopped. Just when you think the damage is done, here comes the TSUNAMI!!

At this point in movie history you can no longer re-invent the disaster movie unless you set the story on another planet. That being said, San Andreas is a hoot to watch. Often it is bone chilling. There was just nowhere to run when the after effects of the tremors start to hit. Who ever thought you could drown on the top floors of an office building? That was one of the many things I learned from San Andreas. This is another film that is best seen on the big screen this summer.

Only The Smartest Bearded Dragons Check Out The Cave Of Cool's Facebook

 

Thanks to my friend Malibu for sending a picture of her dragon enjoying my captions on the Facebook. This could almost be a meme.

 

Tuesdays From The Toybox

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Your Favorite 80s Groups Say About You

What Your Favorite ’80s Band Says About You.

 

I have decided to since I in no way can choose just one.

I have NO IDEA what some of these descriptions mean.

HUMAN LEAGUE

THE CURE



THOMPSON TWINS


 

BILLY IDOL


 

EURYTHMICS


 

JOHN COUGAR


 

THE SMITHS


 

THE POLICE


 

THE CLASH


 

DEPECHE MODE


 

A-HA

 

  

Written by John Peck for McSweeney’s, 2011

Tears For Fears: You have used whiteout on a pair of white loafers.
Art of Noise: You have been paid to be furniture at a party.
Pat Benatar: You have had three or more Superball bruises at one time.
Air Supply: You have punched an arcade game hard enough to injure yourself.
Eddie Money: You have eaten several Shrinky-Dinks on purpose.
Bryan Adams: Your hair smells faintly like barbecue sauce.
Dexy’s Midnight Runners: Your shower smells like Skittles and unfiltered cigarettes.
Dead or Alive: Your pet smells like Goldschlager.
Tangerine Dream: You have a half-full can of Sanka at the back of your cupboard.
Devo: You have dissected a Nintendo game.
Simple Minds: You have tasted a scented pen.
Kajagoogoo: You have used AquaNet in self-defense.
Limahl: You have used Nair in self-defense.
Naked Eyes: You have almost been tricked into eating silly string on a saltine.
Gary Numan: You own more than one pair of sock garters.
Mike and the Mechanics: You have thrown a Rolodex at a raccoon or skunk.
Peter Gabriel: You know what Fimo tastes like.
Roxette: You have injured yourself with a Q-Tip.
Madonna: Your bedroom smells like Midori.
B-52s: Your laundry room smells like Midori.
Richard Marx: You have woken up to a dog licking your hair.
Wham!: You have made nachos while on ecstasy.
The Cure: You have several bracelets or rings you cannot remove.
Berlin: The last book you read used “countenance” as a verb.
This Mortal Coil: You know the act, scene and line that “this mortal coil” comes from.
Billy Idol: You own a piece of clothing that involves both argyle and leather.
Robert Palmer: You have used “argyle” as a verb.
Tommy Tutone: You have attempted to use a Polaroid picture as an ID.
Rick Astley: You have used a hairnet as a handbag.
Bangles: You have chewed gum while delivering a keynote speech or eulogy.
Psychedelic Furs: You have worn sunglasses through an entire tooth cleaning.
The English Beat: You have injured yourself while doing the Electric Slide.
General Public: You have injured yourself while doing the Centipede.
Madness: You have injured several bystanders while doing the Centipede.
Men at Work: You wear shorts with boots at least once a week.
Eurythmics: You have lost a mood ring in a hot tub.
The Smiths: You have read aloud to a hamster, ferret, or turtle.
Joy Division: You have been bitten by a cat while trying to dress it in period costume.
New Order:  You own several fish tanks but no fish.
A Flock of Seagulls: You have destroyed a calculator watch in anger.
Men Without Hats: You have accidentally dropped a pager into a tub of frozen yogurt.
Nena: You have put a cigarette out in a piece of birthday cake.
John Cougar Mellencamp: You have put a cigarette out in an industrial-sized jar of relish.
Loverboy: You have eaten relish as a meal.
Rick Springfield: Your wallet weighs over a pound.
Falco: You have killed a fly with a program from Cats.
Michael Jackson: You have exploded a beanbag chair by landing on it.
Huey Lewis and the News: You are hanging from monkey bars in two or more successive class pictures.
The Police: You have shattered a Rubik’s Cube with a rock.
Sting: You have tried and failed to shatter a Rubik’s Cube with a rock.
Big Country: You have a Highlander poster in a tube in the back of your closet.
Soft Cell: You mouth the words when you watch Highlander.
A-ha: You own a VCR with a copy of Highlander stuck in it.
Survivor: You have cut a Nerf football in half to see what was inside.
INXS: You have knocked someone over with an Aerobie.
Thomas Dolby: You have used a laserdisc as a shaving mirror.
Pet Shop Boys: You have woken up next to an empty bottle of Magic Shell.
Mr. Mister: You have forgotten soup in the freezer and ice cream in the microwave on the same night.
Wang Chung: You have a money clip with an amusement park logo printed on it.
Bauhaus: You know what LARPing is.
OMD: You have gone to a party dressed as a dark elf.
Culture Club: You have woken up under someone who was dressed as a dark elf.
Ministry: You have thrown up on someone who was dressed as a dark elf.
Cocteau Twins: You have spilled Zima on someone who was dressed as a dark elf.
Toni Basil: You have spilled Zima into a motel heating vent.
The Pointer Sisters: You dot your i’s with hearts.
The Pretenders: You are excellent at dodgeball.
ABC: You were one of the first ten people in history to drop a cell phone in a toilet.
Lionel Richie: You have shaved a word into your hair.
The Cars: You have hit a whiffle ball with a fake lightsaber.
Frankie Goes to Hollywood: You have woken up under your high school gym teacher.
Joan Jett: You have woken up on top of your high school gym teacher.
Simply Red: You have temporarily blinded someone by whipping your hair into them.
Europe: You think Europe is Asia.
Asia: You think Asia is Europe.
REM: You minored in something.
Cyndi Lauper: You have lost several silk scarves to escalators.
Starship: You consistently pay for extra cheese at Subway.
The Fixx: You have sunbathed in a suit.
Phil Collins: You have worn shorts while accepting an award or diploma.
Go-Go’s: Your favorite air freshener is Vanillaroma.
Bananarama: Your favorite air freshener is New Car.
Prince: You have used a hamster ball as a cocktail shaker.
Depeche Mode: You have drawn Tintin or the Little Prince in the margin of a math test.
Erasure: You have been caught kissing a copy of The Little Prince.
Thompson Twins: You have been spanked with a copy of The Little Prince.
Human League: You have been spanked with a VHS copy of The Neverending Story.
The Clash: Your safety word is “Nicaragua.”
Grace Jones: Your safety word is forty-seven syllables long.
Brian Eno: Your safety word is “10011101.”
Duran Duran: Your safety word is “Kim Wilde.”
Kim Wilde: You have forgotten your safety word.

 

Tales From The Collection Of Cool

 

A big thank you to Debra of She Who Seeks for giving me a Toys R Us gift card for my fiftieth birthday. I spent about an hour in the store today looking for a great way to spend it. It wasn't an easy decision. I wanted a great piece that would honor the person who gifted it to me. At first I thought about getting several figures but then thought it would be nice to add a real collector piece to my collection.

 

For that reason I found myself back at the Monster High aisle - arguably my favorite aisle in the store. I have been looking for this WORKING light up recharge chamber for a long time and to get one WITH an additional figure is something I couldn't pass up.

 

I am a big fan of the design aspect of this toy. The clear and colored cut out plastic pieces are a hallmark of the entire line. I love all the different things you can do with this manufacturing technology. Also those who collect Monster High will be crazy for something mint in box since it's easy to loose the little pieces once you open the toy.

 

 

I love the sheer imagination of this set. You take your Frankie Stein doll with her special long hair and place her into the chamber. Then you turn it on and it's an instant lesson in static electricity - perfect for the daughter of Frankenstein's Monster. I hate to admit how much I love this stuff but I only collect the stuff I love.

 

 

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

 

Cherries are in season and there is nothing better than the sweet colon cleanse that comes from eating them all month long.

 

Goodnight Dune

 

LOOK! Paul is a little Kangaroo Mouse!

 

http://goodnightdune.com/

 

Zatanna Cosplay By Icyirena

http://icyirena.deviantart.com/

 

 

Birthday Boy On The Hunt For Toys

 

I decided to do some toy shopping today and get a Five Guys burger for lunch. I really know how to live it up on my fiftieth don't I? Well, why should this day be different from any other?

 

 

I can do this toy shopping with more verve than usual because I got FIFTY BUCKS in Toys R Us money from long time commenter Debra. I love this woman and everything she brings to my blog. She doesn't have to like everything I post about but she always has a comment to share. We live a city apart but have never met. I have no idea what she even looks like because she likes to blog anonymously. I like that. I can respect that kind of relationship and I value her friendship most because it's perfectly on our terms. I will share what I purchase with her generous gift. Thank you again my friend.

 

I Understand This Magnificent Bastard Turns 50 Today

 

Meh.