Wednesday, January 16, 2019

Squares And Rectangles, Bitches. SQUARES AND RECTANGLES!!

 
This is all we had to build with. No doors, no windows, no trees, no people, no wheels, no animals, nothing related to Harry Potter. That's right. And we built our crappy houses and planes and spaceships like we were reinventing the wheel - which we didn't have so we couldn't even make a car. But still I persevered and was awarded membership in the Lego Junior Builder's Club - the fact that they spelled my name wrong is beside the point. The multigenerational ship I crafted from THREE sizes of bricks and THREE sizes only and made magic. Then I took a picture and mailed it away with my NEW address which was now in Southern Germany and this card actually found me only a few months after I submitted my work for judging back in North America.
 
 
Signed by JOHN BLOCK so I knew it was legit.

 
Unfortunately I come from a time  where you were lucky if you got a photo taken from you a few times a year, your birthday and Christmas and that was it. We were never recorded daily like today's offspring are. It makes me crazy because I had a hella interesting childhood that should be on film let alone photographs and slides. So the ONE shot I could take at the end of the role of 24 was the shot that I had to send to the scoundrels at LEGO. No way to even photocopy it or scan it or anything.
 
You damn punk kids have no idea what it was life. I mean look at what you can do with Lego these days and do your building while streaming on the YOU TUBES so that old men like me can become even more bitter and enraged by what we were denied in childhood. We only had 11 channels on the TV and NO INSTAGRAM or the demon Twitter.
 
No one born after the year 2000 would never have survived it if they went back in time and tried to do a whole year of high school with only the tools of that age like a trapper keeper and maybe a Walkman if you had the right connections.
 
 Sorry, got off track for a second. But just compare the box above with the sets below and you can see why I suffer. With these materials to build with as a child, these options, I could have designed PLANETS. I could have been a great architech but once again, the MAN KEPT ME DOWN...by deliberately delaying the grown and explosion of Lego but only after I could no longer use my childlike energy and imagination and train me to be a construction genius.
 



 

5 comments:

j-swin said...

We built WORLDS out of squares and rectangles....and the occasional flat green base.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Thank you for being an even more pathetic kid than I was. I build a SPACESHIP buddy, designed to carry generations through space.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

sorry...I thought you wrote WORDS so jumped at you like a Puma on a cupcake. My bad.

DrGoat said...

It was Lincoln Logs in my day. Posts, slats, and red pieces of wood.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

I loved Lincoln Logs. They made me want to live in a cabin in the woods like Lincoln himself.