I gotta say that baseball got a whole lot more interesting for me since that guy got tazed the other night. I could watch some ignorant goober from Philadelphia get tazed most every night.
You just knew the minute he jumped that rail that it was all just a matter of time before he was on the ground, shaking and buzzing like a wasp on a windshield.
In the old days they would just wrestle these goofs to the ground and lead them off the field. What fun was that to watch? Bravo to the brilliant mind in upper management that determined 'enough was ENOUGH'!
I think the tazer gun really ramps up the entertainment value. Watching them drop like a bag of wet cement is better than seeing the mascot do his stupid dance on the dugout.
Hell they should just taze the mascot too.
And the guys who strikes out or pops an infield fly ball. Also if you drop the ball or flub a throw - that should be a tazing. Then four or five times a game, if things are getting slow, you could randomly taze some players. WAKE UP! Time to earn that ridiculously high salary you are being paid. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZAP.
And don't think I forgot about the people in the stand. No sir. The fifth inning should be the TAZER inning. For that entire inning if you are radomly tazed in your seat then you win a hundred dollar gift certificate to Potter Barn or The TaZer Warehouse. You get an extra fifty if the electrocuting seat you are sitting in makes you crap your pants. The 'jumbotron' should do a five second countdown and then catch the person right at the moment the current is entering their bodies. The rest of the stadium can cry 'OLE' or 'BUZZZZZZZ'. Beats the hell out of doing 'the wave'.
Then will come that fine warm summer day when the NAKED guy runs onto the field of play. He gets his shot right square on bare ass or on his nuts. Now THAT'S a ball game!
Just check out the grace and technique of the security guy in this picture. It's a thing of beauty to look at. He led his target and he got him. Brought that young buck down and down hard. That is old school tazering - it's textbook. Something you kids out there need to aspire too.
%20(002).jpg)
10 comments:
You Canuks are so blood thirsty ;-)
We just know how to use electricity for maximum entertainment value. My ideas can be applied to most if not all professional sports. Olympic games too. Hell I just want to tazer the whole damn world. "zap zap zap ha ha ha ha ha"
I'm with you. Run on the field....FRY!
Also, a tazing is in order for the idiots in the stands who boo it.
Our Canadian police force has a history of tazering you for being Polish.
Did I say that out loud?
Sometimes you got to break a few eggs to make good comedy, MD.
See Pat, I like the way you think. Look how much we can get done when we put our thoughts to the positive and comical use of tazers?
You are having much more success with your post than mine. :-(
While I can appreciate his technique, it's kind of like dynamite in a fishing pond. You're jumping down, so you've already put yourself into a walled-off pen of sorts. It's a shame muffin-top couldn't keep up with dumb-runner. A flying leap tackle into a face-plant into the turf would be so much more satisfying.
Watch it again Ricky. That jolt looked pretty satisfying to me.
Until he stop moving I thought he was just sliding into an imaginary third. Looked painful on that turf.
Got depsefu.
This is golden! If they had practiced this when I was still a big fan - I wouldn't have stopped watching! I w/ you zap 'em all!
Post a Comment