Hooligans And Their Shenanigans

So in Vancouver they are setting cop cars on fire just because their team didn't win the Stanley Cup. If you lived in this country you could understand (but not condone) how the combination of liquor, other assorted drugs, the mentality of the 'mob' and the harsh ending to two pretty terrific months here in Canada would drive some otherwise OK people to becoming pyromaniacs.

I was really happy when the coverage I was watching switched away from a burning cop car because so many people were endangering themselves by jumping on a over tuned car and posing - usually with their shirts off. I was more embarrassed for them than impressed with their youthful defiance against 'the man'.

As things would have it the stupid burning cop car's gas tank refuses to explode as these goobers stood on it or next to it and tried to take a picture with their cell phone of them and the cop car. I kept waiting for the flaming car to explode because that is what I was taught would happen. If a fire starts in a car on a TV show or a movie it blows up EVERY SINGLE TIME without exception.

This is a situation when being in the 'mob' might not be in a person's best self interest. One minute you are dancing on the burning husk of an overturned cop car and the next you are landing in Saskatchewan because the exploding gas tank shot you there.

Let me explain something to you window lickers. You live in VANCOUVER British Columbia. It is only one of the greatest and most beautiful cities on the entire planet. You guys live in a cosmopolitan city that is a garden spot in winter while the rest of Canada has seven months of harsh ahead of them. You have no reason to riot. You are not a suffering ethnic group or an individual denied basic human rights. You are a jarhead who thinks that this is the way a fan 'supports the team'.

The cops were terrific. They didn't provoke these bedwetters. They let the 'brave' individuals in the crowd do their six beer chicken dance as long as they didn't cross the line the cops has established as a 'no crossing zone'.

You could tell that they were just waiting like cobras to pounce on the first numnut that thought he was untouchable in a democracy. Yes you can protest all you want - but once you light fires or loot or do other things not in the public good - then that calls for a tazing or to be beat on and about the head with a plastic riot shield or if you prefer, the reliable nightstick.

One brave young looter thought that after he got pinched that he could go on runnin' his mouth against three stressed and anxious boys in blue who were only trying to switch out the 'perp's' handcuffs. When the suspect started to fight back, one cop had had enough and administered a few raps to the head of the miscreant with his night stick. That action pretty much neutralized that tense situation right quick.

I was hoping to see some compilation footage of all the people that were tazed. I do so love to see the rioters try to run away but are not fast enough to outrun the tazer darts.

I shouldn't find humor in the situation but I had this vision of the ordinary beat cops having to go back to their precincts and explain to their chief how the vehicle they signed out in perfectly good condition yesterday morning, was now upside down and burning along with some poor guy's hotdog cart which was confiscated by the 'the mob' early on in the evening.

I wonder which cops would tell tell the truth that they abandoned the cars when they were surrounded by the rioters because their lives were in danger at that moment and which cops would invent some elaborate series of events that they both agreed upon before they ever had to break the bad news to their boss.

So there was a riot after the end of game seven of the Stanley Cup finals and some cops are going to have to double up and share the remaining cop cars for the immediate future until new cars can be acquired. Wanna bet the insurance companies nickle and dime the police force. The police organization is paying a premium for the insurance coverage so that if there happens to be a few cars that get turned on their roofs and set ablaze, they are covered on the replacement vehicle.

I was watching the coverage from Vancouver and I just wasn't impressed with these punks. Maybe I was just spoiled watching all the great G7 protesters. Now those people were focused. Real protesters anticipate the use of teargas and use a countermeasure like a gas mask - just pulling your hoody up around your head is just not going to get the job done.

If you believe that throwing your empty beer bottle at the cops somehow earned you anything but my scorn then you will never understand how stupid and bad for your city this incident is.

I know it's Canada and because it's Canada the love of 'the game' is in all our blood - much like maple syrup, A&W root beer, Ketchup, Kraft Dinner and Tim Horton's. I get that you are pissed because for two months you were on this unbelievable ride with the Canucks. To have things end the way they did really did suck. The entire country will be in mourning for the next couple of days and then we will look outside and from there actually go outside and laugh at how dumb it was to still be watching Hockey in June.

All this late night stupidity did was to wreck the awesome collective experience we all had following the Canucks to game seven of the Stanley Cup finals. Now the events of tonight are forever link up with this year's 'run for the cup'.

Up until last night we were on a pretty sweet ride. This riot will continue up to the point where drunk angry people become sleepy drunk angry people and the rioters start to make their way home. Unfortunately the buses that the rioters hoped would take them home won't come downtown to get them because THEY made that to dangerous for them bus drivers to do so. If they were burning cop cars just think of how trilled these morons would be to have an entire bus to play with.

The authorities also closed two bridges that lead out of downtown. That was done to keep others from flooding back downtown to participate in the riot. This move also had the additional bonus effect of making it difficult for the participants in this 'protest' to make an easy, delay free escape home.

Oh and all you people who cheered for Boston just to be a pain in the ass to someone who was a Canuck fan - I will never understand you. There is no explanation good enough to justify why someone would cheer any team other than Vancouver once they became the only Canadian team in contention for for the cup. Those of us in the tundra watch every year as our small number of teams get eliminated. Once the playoffs get to the point where you can no longer follow a team from Canada I lose interest very fast.

I like all of our Canadian teams with none more special than the other. All I ask from my teams is that they work hard to get themselves into the playoffs. It's only there that you win the Stanley Cup. Canada understands that we can always make the claim that there has never been a year where a Canadian player did not get to hoist the cup above his head. That's not the same as watching a strong Canadian actually earn a spot in the finals.

I choose to believe that the collective ennui my country is feeling is related to the dark storm clouds I can see from my window. Way to twist the knife even deeper Planet Earth. I think I will take a break and go bury some plastic bottles in my back yard.