Tuesday, December 27, 2011

I Don't Know How They Every Got The Idea That They Need To Shop For Me


My mother is one of those people who hates to see useful products go to waste. She likes nothing better than going through the possessions of dead people to pick out what she can donate to the poor or new immigrants to Canada. She does this through her church and her position puts her at the choke point for any donations.

As you can imagine I get stuck with helping her sort through the boxes. Often it's a freak show of styles from the Island That Fashion Forgot.

My mother used to be a stylish woman. At some point in the last five years, however, she has lost the ability to tell what looks good on a person and what doesn't.

I have gotten pretty hip to her schemes and am skeptical of any 'gifts' she tries to bestow on me. Today it was a series of beautiful shirts. All of them were made of a thick canvas material and included shiny stitching and fake pearl snap buttons. It was a stampede of tacky cowboy fashions.

I am not a pretty man but I have my limit as to what I will wear in public. Since I won't be riding any wee ponies in the future I figured I can take a fashion risk and resist the Gay Rustler look.

I am getting my beard trimmed up on Thursday. I should dress up in my new duds and give the ladies at the salon a good laugh.

6 comments:

Punk Chopsticks said...

Lol no, not pretty maybe, but AWESOME XD I'd grow out a bear if I could...but I'm asian. No hair. Kinda sad.

Hope you had a rad christmas!!

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

A beard is a lot of responsibility. Be happy you don't have facial hair. I think it would ruin your appeal.

Had a nice quiet Christmas which for me is perfect.

DrGoat said...

I lot the beard a lot. Looks great.

Belle said...

Since I turned 60 I don't dress as well as I used to. I'm the one at the gas station with baggy sweats and no make-up picking up cigarettes. Something happens to you when you get older.

Yeah, I can't see you as a cowboy but only because of your personality. I actually think you would make a good extra in a cowboy movie. You should save one of those shirts just in case. Also, get a hat and boots. You look like the type who would shoot first and ask questions later.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

I kept the purple one with the black trim and pearl snap buttons. Just in case I need to go to the rodeo.

You are just full of love for me today. I do look intimidating but I really am not. It's such a joke that people think one thing just from seeing me.

Kids often think I am a biker or wrestler. But so do female wrestlers and biker girls so I am ahead in that respect.

Super-Duper ToyBox said...

ruggedly Handsome!