Remember this day, World. It's Bash on Canada Day. If you didn't hear the news, Canada pulled out of the flawed Kyoto Accords yesterday. These accords are meant to control global warming, something I believe is a reality but I like to call it Global Climate CHANGE.
There are many opinions about why we pulled out but basically we saw the writing on the wall. Without the US or China in this agreement, it was unworkable. They are among the two worst contributors to the problem.
Because of our TAR SANDS, Canada would be over the limit of allowed emissions. Something that would cost us billions of dollars in penalties. Something we don't have to give at a time when we need to build our infrastructure in preparation for the economic surge that is coming to my part of the world.
Our economy weathered the latest global economic crisis pretty well because we are not unregulated greedy asshole Wall Street bastards North of the 49th parallel.
We have regulations against committing the kind of bullshit investments and derivative swaps that brought the global economy to it's knees. More importantly we ENFORCE our regulations.
The systemic government corruption in the US is not helping the problem one damn bit either.
When someone like Newt can get drummed out of politics, quit, go into the private sector and have the government pay for the his advice about the very 'Fannie' and 'Freddie' that he was a large beneficiary off. If that kind of person can now be this close the PRESIDENCY is a bad bad bad bad bad thing. I mean THE OMEN bad.
So Canada is evil? After reading THIS I am starting to think that mabye we are.
Are we better than everyone else? Do we think we are? NO and NO. We just have a unique understanding of human beings and human nature. Every peoples of the world call Canada home. We absorb and assimilate the best of the your culture. We are like the BORG only funnier. We know people are selfish greedy little rodents and they will do anything to advance their position or improve their lot in life.
Survive a long Canadian winter in a house full of people and tell me you don't learn a little something about getting along with the other human beings around you. It doesn't mean you are a doormat but you CHOOSE your battles. You say your peace and for today I am telling all of you to get a fucking grip.
You are all so eager to find enemies in this world that you choose CANADA?
The power centers of North America have wised up and realize that we just can't deal with issues surrounding middle east oil any longer. It's a drain on our resources, our blood and our treasure. You people live there, work out your own damn problems for once.
Everyone JUST GO HOME!
Especially you brave, magnificent bastards on the island of TUVALU. I must confess that since reading MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY I have had a fascination with the South Pacific Islands, Especially the beautiful Bora Bora (above) and of course, the best named, TUVALU.
Today there are ten thousand hearty souls that call that island nation home.
I regret to say that they are also disappointed with Canada. SHAME SHAME SHAME they say. NO NO NO I say. I hope this doesn't escalate to the point where they get into their outrigger canoes and paddle to our shores in an invasion force the likes of which Canadians have never seen.
If they land in Vancouver they could be fooled into thinking they could survive the Canadian winter. Brilliant. Attack us in winter because that worked so well for Napoleon and Hitler when they tried to attack Russia in the winter but I digress.
TUVALUAN, crossing the Rocky Mountains only to come to a PRAIRIE winter? Any of them that make it to Saskatchewan I will surrender to personally.
We are not footing the bill for this bullshit and you can't make us. We are grown ups. Well you have a proposal that doesn't give us the screwgie then maybe we will talk.
We are all about environmental protection. We try our best to do our mining and drilling with safety and respect for the people and environment around the work sites. FUCK YOU to tell US about a clean environment, India and China.
We see the smog and the garbage and the toxic shit that you put into the air, land and water every single damn day. We have this tool called the INTERNET. Maybe you heard of it. We can access information which is what you should have done before popping off about us and our intentions.
For once I am totally behind nuts like our local boy DAVE RUTHERFORD and that scares the hell out of me most days. He is our Bill O'Rielly only he's smarter and more arrogant. REALLY has a face for radio. He's also the same kind of conservative prick but he makes me think and today he told us all about the people on the island of TUVALU.
Just days after the news is released that our part of the world is experiencing an economic surge, their are people lined up for a handout. We have it for you but give us a little time to get it together for you first.
I have a tough time at Christmas since my father died so I appreciate the comic distraction. TUVALU???? That, my friends is 'bloody brilliant'. Whatever cosmic jokers write this stuff got it right today.
Next fall on CBC we will have a quirky half hour comedy about a group of TUVALUAN immigrants who come to Winnipeg in the heart of a killer Manitoba winter and they live together in a small apartment house near Portage and Main, the coldest downtown in the world. The intersection of those two roads creates some interesting wind patterns especially in a blizzard. We could ring much comedy and witty observations on the human condition out of that concept.
Again my talent is wasted on a world that seems a little colder today.
I just look up TAVALU and this is a very interesting article about TUVALU'S push for zero emissions. I agree with them. Maybe their cause needs a little attention today so I am okay with this. Polynesians also have a unique perspective on things.
People are people. Long live the fighters.
Oh and I am still sick about upsetting Brother TUTU. He's mad at us because of KYOTO also. WE WALKED TOGETHER FOR MANDELA AND HE DOES A BROTHER THIS WAY? No call, no, "Hey Cal. Wassup?" I almost defriended him.
I forever stand vigilant to protect this planet from the myriad of forces that are always against us. Be it the octopus, zombies, aliens or the robots my team of human agents, and our feline allies, circle the globe in a never ending struggle for human freedom.
I learn all I can on every subject that interests me. I especially enjoy ancient history because in the past there are valuable lessons to be found. Also, if I ever get my time machine to work properly, it would be good to know a bit about possible destinations and what to expect when I get there.
I greatly appreciate beautiful design. Be it manufactured or found naturally I am fascinated by the process of invention. I am attracted to the unique, the strange, the haunted. I like to share what I find on this blog.
And not let us forget the 'Cephalopod Menace' who, if allowed to, would wrap their tentacles around all that is good and pure in this life and crush it until it remained no more. They are creatures of pure spite. Hate is all they know. Death is all they do. They are our most ruthless and determined enemy.
So we fight. Selena has the celebrity contacts, the cat is ruthless and without pity, Roosevelt's ghost has the experience and I do the wetwork.
Fighting for the future of the planet doesn't have to be a chore, however. We can take the time to appreciate all that is cool in this world even as we cut the octopus into bite sized chunks.
This is the reason there has always been and must forever be, a Cave of Cool. Be sure to wipe your feet before you enter.