Thursday, November 29, 2012

GQ Lists The 25 LEAST Influencial People Of 2012

Any magazine can do a year-end list of influential people who have accomplished far more than most of us ever will. But only GQ possesses the iron testicles to count down the twenty-five least significant men and women of 2012—a collection of people so uninspiring that we should round them all up and stick them on an iceberg. Please note that these folks are ranked in no particular order, because all zeros are created equal.

1. Mitt Romney

Was anyone inspired by Mitt Romney? Did anyone vote enthusiastically for Mitt Romney? Of course not. Voting for Romney is like hooking up with the last single person at the bar at 4 a.m. The only successful thing he did this year was embody every black stand-up comedian's impression of a white person. Thank God the election's over. No more endless photos of Mitt staring winsomely off-camera with that attempted smile on his face. No more glaring campaign mishaps week after week after week. No more labored media efforts to make him look like anything other than Sheldon Adelson's pampered money Dumpster. Good-bye, Mitt. I hope you enjoy the rest of your life quietly ensconced at Lake Winnipesaukee, blissfully ignorant of the plight of anyone who doesn't have $300 million squirreled away in the Bahamas.

I can say that I hate to pile on Mittens but that wouldn't be the truth. So many great digs left to take at him until he finally fades from view. I couldn't resist sharing this with you. You can see the rest of the list and revel in the snark by going HERE.

 

13 comments:

Jaime Hood said...

Ouch, Madonna made the list. I can't say I'm surprised, her career these past couple of years has been one big pile of WTF. I wish she'd go back to doing stuff like Borderline and own the shit out of it, now that it's actually cool again to have an 80's sound. Instead she's trying too hard to put out music that sounds like everything else out there, and is totally inappropriate for her age. It's sad. She's staying too long at the party she herself threw.

Kal said...

That is the best analysis of the state of her career that I have ever heard. Borderline was a great song. She's just an old piece of veiny rope now.

Paladin said...

Geez.... Obsess much? At least throw in a couple of George Bush bashes to mix it up a little :)

Remember, the opposite of love isn't hate.

It's indifference.

Erik Johnson Illustrator said...

I'll grant that Mitt at least is one of the more memorable names on this list, that at least ought to earn him a place next to Dan Quayle in the Hall of Obscure Coulda-Been Presidents.

I do feel kind of sorry that John Carter director Andrew Stanton made the list. He was obviously passionate about the project but was in way over his head.

Kal said...

Come on Paladin. Give me this one. You know Mitt has a special place in my bitter heart.

Erik - I am glad that I saw John Carter before all the bad press came out about it. I liked it for what is was.

david_b said...

Too funny. For every one article like this, there's a dozen written to the likewise, which you'll never recognize.

Most of us (who are actually IN America, Kal...) are saying goodbye to the USA we once knew and loved. Pensions..?? The poor will become poorer, the President will get a much higher pension than ANYONE ever ought to imagine (look up Chicago retirement pensions..) and where will our President be when the Fiscal Cliff..? On vacation again (like he's ever going to visit the poor suffering folks at the Sandy sites again). He visited even less than W did for Katrina..

Oh, the truth hurts ever so much.

david_b said...

One day, you'll be freed from this remarkable bitterness, sir.

david_b said...

We can add others like Al Gore, John Edwards and John Kerry to that 'Coulda-Been' list, Erik.

To have all been done in by W. Very impressive indeed.

Well said, sir.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Glad to see that Lance Armstrong made the list.

Kal said...

Lance one of the biggest douches because he KNEW all along that he was cheating each and everytime he one and took the accolades on false pretenses.

Kal said...

David, I love the way you talk to me like I will ever change my beliefs. And you are right. Obama ruined the America you used to know. And television now comes in color - did you know that.

david_b said...

You've said yourself you' have a 'bitter heart', sir. I'm only agreeing once again, implicitly and sadly.

I don't believe American Politics is really your forte of Coolness, but will remain your loyal Luke Skywalker-Resistance Fighter through thick and thin.

And always hopeful.




Kal said...

Of course you don't...because I can have some perspective from a distance. You are too close to it all to ever give the Kenyan Socialist a break. But if we didn't infuriate each other then what would be the point?