Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Noah Ark Is My Least Favorite Bible Story Which Is Also The Least Plausible

What Ham and company have created is an affront to all known scientific data known to mankind; and he and his ilk are lying to deceive – don’t forget that all too often, religion is the refuge of ignorance.

Consider the fact that, not only are the 13,000 known species represented in the Ark, Ham and company took the time to increase the population of the Ark with the thousands of species of dinosaurs that died out millions of years, err, I mean 4000 years ago like it says in the bible. So now there were 275 foot Apatosauruses on the Ark weighing a combined 50 tons on a boat that was 500 feet long and 86 feet wide. They probably climbed in and went to sleep with the muggles on the ship because carnivores and herbivores have always gotten along.

I have HUGE problems with the Noah Ark story and have since I was a a kid. I was THAT kid who asked more questions than he should have in Sunday School which was the worst day for school and reason for school ever invented. I had no patience for all that god balloon juice because of all the holes in those stories. It's like they were just making shit up to impress me and get me to believe. But why would they have to make up anything if what they were saying was the truth?

I was a very smart and sad and angst filled child.

The flat imbecility of creationists/flat Earthers who believe that 2 of everything of the 13,000 species of Earth-dwellers lived on a boat 500 feet long for 40 days and 40 nights without any food is entirely ludicrous. The 600 year-old man who built an Ark for God exists only in the fertile ground of the primitive mind.

Selling lies to a compliant following is the charlatan’s profession but you won’t hear Ken Ham or Ray Comfort ever complain about their 73 Million dollar abortion in Williamstown Kentucky.

What is even better, if you’re in the business of selling lies disguised as faith, is that the Ark Encounter Ministries will not have to pay a nickel in taxes to the state of Kentucky, ever. Whoever said that America was the ‘land of opportunity’ was either a preacher or a snake-oil salesman which in this day and age, what’s the difference?


Jordan said...

Cal, you need to see these:

Noah's Ark (part 1 of 2)

Noah's Ark (part 2 of 2)

Jordan said...

By the way, Cal, I just went to Facebook to send you a dropbox link to a downloadable copy of Homer Price (inspired by your post yesterday)...only to see that I did exactly the same thing on January 16th. Did you see it? Download it? (The link is to both Homer Price and Centerburg Tales in epub format.)

DrGoat said...

The amazingly strange and inexplicable thing is, facts don't enter into the equation. They believe what they want to and nothing will deter that.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

I know. It's bizarre when it hits this point though. They build a huge fucking art with million and millions of dollars. I never saw that Jordan I will get to it. I have wanted to re-read that great story for years.