Sunday, January 10, 2010
But Stupid Children Need The MOST Love
I can't post enough of these goofy kids in costume. This one is especially close to my heart because they actually felt the need to LABEL what the kid was suppose to be in case there was any lingering doubt out there.
Cooler Than Cool From The Cave Of Cool
Posted without comment because if you don't agree, you, sir, are dead to me.
Music Meme
I have done this before but was reminded of how cool it is by Wings. I think mine turned out to be pretty well. Here are the rules.
Your Wikipedia Band
1. Go to the Wikipedia home page and click random article. That is your band’s name.
2. Click random article again; that is your album name.
3. Click random article 15 more times; those are the tracks on your album.
1. Godiva
2. Tommy Banter
3. Dębina, Gmina Kleszczów
4. Jerilyn Britz
5. Claude Comair
6. De Interpretatione
7. Geoffrey Zimmerman
8. Polychaeton
9. Billy Fogg
10. Ian Allen
11. Amorinópolis
12. Ian Porter
13. Delta 1000
14. Set Dresser
15. USS Porpoise
Your Wikipedia Band
1. Go to the Wikipedia home page and click random article. That is your band’s name.
2. Click random article again; that is your album name.
3. Click random article 15 more times; those are the tracks on your album.
1. Godiva
2. Tommy Banter
3. Dębina, Gmina Kleszczów
4. Jerilyn Britz
5. Claude Comair
6. De Interpretatione
7. Geoffrey Zimmerman
8. Polychaeton
9. Billy Fogg
10. Ian Allen
11. Amorinópolis
12. Ian Porter
13. Delta 1000
14. Set Dresser
15. USS Porpoise
Clash Of The Titans Re-Edit
Using the soundtrack from the NEW 'Clash of the Titans' trailer, someone created this preview for the original 1980 movie we all have a fondness for. If I had seen THIS trailer when the 1980 version came out I would have wet my pants. Very cool.
Oh, You Mean THIS Girl?
"I heard her call out and when I got here she was already unconscious. I hope you don't think that I had anything to do with her current condition because that is just silly. Well, now that you are here, I think I will be on my way officer. You have a good day now, you hear?"
http://exclamationmark.tumblr.com/
GUMBY LOOK OUT!
It's those freakin' Blockheads. They are up to no good, Gumby. Don't trust them and don't give them matches.
http://eclecticbanana.tumblr.com/
http://eclecticbanana.tumblr.com/
Crossing The Line?
If I call them 'action figures' can I get away with it?
"To be fair, these aren't real Real Dolls: they're "Life-Sized Superhero Figures," dressed to resemble the superheroine of your choice. Choose from Supergirl, Batgirl, Wonder Woman or, if you like to Make Yours Marvel, you can get Emma Frost as well."
http://cgi.ebay.com/SUPER-SEXY-CUSTOM-LIFE-SIZE-FIGURE-SUPERGIRL-BATGIRL_W0QQitemZ310185340348QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item48387cadbc
http://occasionalsuperheroine.blogspot.com/
Saturday, January 9, 2010
What The Hell?
Spiderman has a WTF moment when he realizes that the Japanese have never read a single issue of his comic. If they had then they would have known that he doesn't wear a short wave radio on his wrist. It could have been worse. They could have messed up one of the great iconic superhero costumes of all time.
I love the way some words have no Japanese translation so they use the English word in the middle of a song or conversation. Also, why would they have Spidey control a giant Power Rangers brand robot but not paint it up to look like Spider-Man? I can see many a confused villain wonder where the hell that 'little guy with the webs went". One minute they are fighting him and the next they got a giant robot stomping them into the ground. With great power must come great stupidity. E for effort Japan but F for execution.
http://eclecticbanana.tumblr.com/
These Are Some Sweet Sweet Noms
I am so craving some pizza right now. Look at the color of that slice...and the pepperoni...and the cheese. SIGH.
http://eclecticbanana.tumblr.com/
What I Love Most About Doom
He don't bother with the little fish. Cosmically powered foes? Yeh, that is more of Doom's speed. What a magnificent egomaniac he is. He bitch slapped the Beyonder once and that guy was ALL powerful.
http://comicbooks.tumblr.com/
Classic School Assignment
This kid would get an A+ from me for the entertainment value alone. Click to enlarge.
Celebrity Big Brother UK
Seriously...if I have to spend a month listening to Steven Baldwin spout his religious 'balloon juice' I am gonna go nuts. I hope they get rid of him sooner rather than later. When former Hollywood madame Heidi Fliess calls you a dork you know its time to take a good hard look at your life and how you interact with others. If there is one thing people hate it's having some holy roller shoving the Bible in your face at every opportunity. Makes me miss the calming effects of the Spanish Inquisition.
Cool Meme
1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
Joe Lieberman or anyone of Fox "news" or Rush Limbaugh
2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
It begins and ends with Nickelback. They have been working my last nerve and living on borrowed time for so long now.
3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
Joe Lieberman or Rush
4. What is your favorite cheese?
Emmental or Gouda - those European cheeses
5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?
Pastrami with Swiss on rye bread with hot mustard
6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
I would say Selena Gomez but then I would be called a perv by my awesome blog readers so I would have to go with Milla Jovovich. She would be a fierce piece of sweet and I probably wouldn't survive the encounter.
7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
Shirley Manson of Garbage - love her.
8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
Magazines, graphic novels, lunch
9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
Austria - Saltzberg and Vienna
10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?
schnitzel with beer and fine chocolate
11. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?
Fine Russian vodka
12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
Probably the birth or Resurrection of Jeebus just so I could videotape the whole thing and see if it happened the way the books say it did. I would interview Jeebus when he was at the height of his popularity and have him, in his own words, remind those who pervert his message to discriminate against others that they are going straight to hell.
13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
"Don't be a dick". After that no other rules are necessary (well maybe 'don't Bogart that joint' but...you know)
14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?
'Live From the Cave of Cool'. It would have interesting guests and performers from all over the world. It would be the go-to site for celebrities seeking redemption for all their sins and new bands just starting out. I may also have a different co-host each week.
15.What is your favorite curse word?
"Fuck." - It's universal.
16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?
Call the cat and he does what he does best. Makes shreds out of their wraps and kicks some dried up mummy ass.
17. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item?
The picture of my father and his medals which are in the same frame.
18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
Push the red button and bring all those sons of bitches with me.
19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be?
It begins and ends with time travel.
20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
I would take a half-hour of time with my father before the medication made it hard for him to communicate. I would retell him all the things I told him the first time around and let him know that we will be okay.
21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
I would have liked to have 10 more years with my Dad
22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin’! What country are you going to live in now?
Austria - the best of old and new Europe
23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?
Don't do bars. Boat has sailed on that one. If I can change the question a bit and only have ONE fast food restaurant it would be 'Wendy's'
24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question…. If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like “Dude, check it out…I can FLOAT!”?
It would frustrate the hell out of me to just float around. I would go home and hide my face in shame.
25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?
Da Vinci - set him loose in a warehouse full of modern tools and see what kind of crazy shit he comes up with that will allow me to take over the world.
26. The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
My father for selfish reasons so that he could see his two grandchildren grow up.
27. What’s your theme song?
"The World Is Not Enough" by Garbage
The Red Baron
You have to admire the pilots in WWI. They fought high above the trenches in planes that were death traps to begin with. They didn't view themselves as regular soldiers. They were more like adventurers playing a high stakes game of cat and mouse with their enemies. The 'hunt' was what was important. None of these brave pilots were more famous than Baron Manfred von Richthofen, the so-called Red Baron (only the coolest nickname EVER!).
Von Richthofen would tell his men, "We are sportsmen, not butchers". They were expected to be symbols of all that was 'old school' heroic and seemed to come from a different era entirely. It was more important for pilots to be gentlemen and follow a code of ethics (to fight with 'grace'). They would never kill an opponent who was not shooting at them first. They would view the strafing of ground troops as 'rude'.
There is a scene midway through the film that shows the Baron sharing a drink and conversation with the Canadian pilot (Charles Brown) who would eventually be the one to shoot the Red Baron down. They both had found themselves being forced to make an emergency landing. Once on the ground they were no longer adversaries. They were just a couple of guys who got separated from their squadrons. The war only existed for them while they were flying.
Richthofen's achievements in the air caught the attention of the German Kaiser early on. He saw in the young pilot, the perfect tool for propaganda. This was something that Richthofen resented because it took him away from flying and doing what he did best. Despite the fact that he would be easy to spot in the air, the Baron insisted on painting his plane red so as to strike fear in the heart of the enemies when they saw him coming.
The movie has many great fight scenes where you experience what it must have been like to participate in aerial combat. The rest of the film, however, feels cold and detached emotionally. Even the romance with a french nurse (Lena Heady) lacks passion. What we get are snippets of the famous Ace's career and I left the film without learning anything new about the person the Red Baron was. I wanted to know more about where his ethics and ideals came from but the movie left me cold.
It seems that the German public also saw problems with the film. While being one of the most expensive films ever produced in Germany, it was one of its least successful and was roundly panned by critics.
"Germany's greatest First World War fighter ace, Baron Von Richthofen, known as the Red Baron is shown departing his Fokker DR.1 Triplane 425/17 after yet another successful sortie. 425/17 was the aircraft in which the Red Baron finally met his end in April of that year. No fewer than 17 of his victories having been scored in his red-painted triplane."
Now Just Stop Right There
I will give you ONE chance to rethink your slanderous comment about television. TV is good and pure and its not TV's fault that you can't find something great to watch on it. Maybe a little soul searching and looking 'within' yourself will give you some perspective about where things first went wrong for you. If you are honest then you will see that everything bad that has ever happened to you came from YOU. Stop scapegoating TV you hater. Yeh, I said it. I don't blame the person who posted this image. I am sure he had the best of intentions and fully understood the irony of the caption. It's the stinkin' 'creator' of the jpeg that needs some therapy.
Check out the comments to see what Ricky Shambles has to say about this image. He is totally right. TV is just a tool. It's how we use that tool that makes all the difference.
http://samuraifrog.tumblr.com/
Just Funny
"You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast".
This see-through toaster would be too distracting for me to have. I would be fascinated with watching the bread brown all day long. It would be the same as if the satellite had a toast channel.
http://psychedelictits.tumblr.com/
Smokin Aces Two - Electric Boogaloo
Usually when a movie goes 'direct to video' you have a pretty good idea what you can expect from it. No major stars and a half-assed effort by all involved. Occasionally you find a film that inexplicably wasn't released to theatres. I found this with both 'Franklyn' and 'Dorian Grey'. Both were excellent in my opinion and certainly could have held their own against films like the Chipmunks sequel if they had been given the chance to succeed. But, I am not in the movie business so what do I know?
I enjoyed the first 'Smoking Aces' movie. It was ultra violent and batshit crazy and didn't let up in the action for second. Plus, Alicia Key was very sexy in it. This sequel (which is a prequel) begins with an old, wheelchair bound former agent (Tom Berenger) being told that he is the subject of an assassination order - an order that has brought out the world's top killers to fulfill. What they want with this elderly retired agent is unclear.
Joe Carnahan wrote this film as he did the first 'Smokin Aces' movie. The movie has all of his trademark twists and he approaches the material with a lot of confidence. After all, he clearly has a love for this subject matter and you get the feeling that he really wanted to ramp up the blood and guts and try to outdo the craziness of his earlier effort. On that note he succeeded. I was hoping for a more colorful group of assassins this time but they turn out to be more 'cookie cutter' than unique and interesting.
Vinnie Jones is the only recognizable actor beside Berenger. I always liked his tough guy persona and I really want to see him in something mainstream (X-Men 3's Juggernaut doesn't count) because he brings alot of energy to his roles. Currently he is one of the housemates in the UK version of Big Brother. He comes across as a great guy and totally unlike the person portrayed in the British tabloids.
The film is basically a live action cartoon (akin to Itchy and Scratchy) and its great to see everyone get into that spirit. No one is without sin so they all deserve to die. I love not having someone to root for. I just need to wait for the characters to die in violent and creative ways. Some do but most don't.
There is a twist that I figured out almost from the beginning. I was impressed and disappointed with myself for that. Also, for a group of profession gunmen and gunwomen, no one seems to be a very good shot. This is my pet peeve with any assassin movie like this one, it's predecessor and 'The Tournament'. I suppose it's not as visually exiting to have a 'one shot, one kill' policy but having a thousand rounds tear up a bar without killing any of those doing the shooting is just stupid.
There are also a couple of bizarre turns and glaring plot holes that disappointed me. Another pass at the script might have fixed these deficiencies. As it is the movie is nothing special and feels like an opportunity lost. No wonder it went 'direct to video' as it should have. Mystery solved.
"You still scared of clowns Lester?"
"I ain't scared of them...per say. I am just very mindful of their movements that's all.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Sherlock Holmes
I am a huge fan of Robert Downy Jr. I can't remember a film he has ever been in where he let me down. The material may have not been up to his standards but as an actor he is always interesting to watch. For this reason I had little problem with his casting as Sherlock Holmes. He has a way of making interesting choices and I knew that his Holmes would have enough quirks to satisfy this viewer.
I am not so big a fan of director Guy Richie. I liked 'Rockaroller' because the writing was very interesting and was not what I expected at all from the film. I knew his version of Sherlock would be an acquired taste right from the beginning. His Holmes would be more of an action star than we are used to in similar tales involving the famous literary sleuth. Downey plays Holmes as less mannered, less organized and more impulsive that we would expect but these choices worked for me.
As important as the role of Holmes is, the role of Watson, his partner in (solving) crime is really what makes the relationship interesting. It has survived all this time as a contrast between a man who is pure EGO and a man who is more of a combination of EGO and ID. Jude Law fit the bill perfectly.
The changes they made to Watson's character matched up very well with the changes the film made with Holmes. More of a best buddy, than a 'handler, Law's Watson emphasizes the reasons for the duo's friendship in a way I could relate too. Watson is impressed with Holmes not only for his skills but for those parts of Holmes' personality that need much work on. Watson is not afraid to point them out knowing full well that while Holmes may register the complaint, he will always remain his own man. Watson secretly wishes he WAS Holmes and could operate his life free of the conscience that keeps him from fully abandoning the societal norms of Victorian England. He has his reputation as a doctor to maintain.
So taken in it's totality, the Holmes/Watson relationship is more than a bromance but less than a gay coupling. They bicker back and forth like a married couple and have the kind of conversations that one has with a friend who knows all of your secrets. This part of the movie was very strong. I just wish these two guys had something more interesting to do with their time than the movie allows.
Many have also complained that Holmes is too much of a fighter and action star and less of a cerebral solver of puzzles. The fact that Holmes is the master of a thousands disciplines, why wouldn't martial arts from all over the world be part of his skill set? I love the way he plans each fight in his head to best make use of his abilities and time and tailors his style to each individual he comes into conflict with. A real life Holmes would do the EXACT same thing. It's almost Batman like in it's realism.
The big problem with this movie is that the story lets down the two good actors at its center. The 'mystery' for Holmes to solve is pretty mundane and only seeks to put him and Watson into situations they have to jump, run, punch, kick, or slide their way out of. I actually watched half the movie and came back to it 24 hours later only to complete the viewing. I didn't look forward to watching the ending so I assume that anyone who saw it in the theatre squirmed in their seats for most of it.
Was it a success? Partially. Will be get a sequel? Hopefully not. This film is very forgettable. Save your money and watch it when it comes on the movie stations and wait for Iron Man 2. I am sure there will be a script there that is worthy of Downey's talent.
Art Clokey 1921-2010
I never really discovered Gumby until college when one of my professors talked about him and Art Clokey's early use of stop motion animation. For the longest time I wondered where the hell the toy with all the teethmarks I made in it as a child came from. I nearly peed myself to learn so much about Gumby and his pony pal Pokey all at once. From there I tried to find all the animated short films staring Gumby that I could.
I loved the way that Gumby would just skate along the library until he found a book that he liked. Then he would enter the book and have adventures based on the story within. Pokey was the red horse who like Robin, always needed to be saved for one reason or another.
Especially comical were the two blockheads (and yes their heads were square) who were Gumby's arch foes. While Gumby was kind and helpful, they were mean troublemakers. Everything in a Gumby short was pretty much black and white.
Even the theme song was great. I loved the way the kids yell out GUMBY! before the show began. It encouraged kids to let everyone around them know that they best not mess with the dial on the TV lest they suffer the wrath of Gumby.
So thank you Art Clokey for having a vision and bringing us something unique.
Kitty Wants You Dead - Day One
The cats I know would never even contemplate something like this so I must assume that these were created by some kitty with severe emotional problems. They DO have medication for that and as a responsible pet owner it's your responsibility to seek them out. I am not under the delusion that my own beloved kitty isn't dangerous. He is. But he doesn't feel the need to prove it at every opportunity. Like Fluffy says, "If you have to tell everyone you are a gangsta or you are a great lover then you aren't one".
If he wanted to, my best cat does have the necessary training to carry out an assassination. He picked up many such skills during the years when he was doing covert wetwork for the C.I.A. He told me that he has left that life behind him and vowed never again to take a human life. I take him at his word. He is alot of things but a liar isn't one of them.
Thanks to Brother Wings for finding this and sending to me. Come back tomorrow to see a new reason why kitty may want you dead.
Cute Mugshot Of The Week
"I knew Cal needed a cute mugshot to continue this popular feature on his awesome blog so I stole a car. I hope he will continue to visit me when I get locked up because I love him. He's my Big Daddy."
Wicked Cool Pocket Globe - WANT
"THE PROMETHEUS POCKET GLOBE
1 3/8" x 1 3/8" x 1 1/4", and the globe itself is 5/8" in diameter
Pocket globes came into fashion in Georgian England and remained popular until the mid-nineteenth century. They were the executive toys of their era, being three inches, or thereabouts, in diameter, and surrounded by a fitted shagreen case. They also came in cardboard or papier mache boxes. These cases were often lined with star charts or other information. Joseph Moxon, credited with bring pocket globes to England in 1673, is thought to have gotten the idea from the Blaeus, in Holland. The National Maritime Museum, in the UK, has a spectacular collection."
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34798650
Keyboard Cat Is Back!
I am not a fan of Kristen Stewart. I hate 'Twilight' and every picture or interview I see with her she seems eternally in a bad mood. You hit the jackpot girl - smile once or twice at your unbelievable good fortune. Currently she is filming a biopic about the Runaways where she plays the awesome Joan Jett. Any inevitable disappointment I will have with that picture has been soothed by my beloved Keyboard Cat. KC - Play her off.
New Crush - Anna Kendrick
I really enjoyed 'Up in the Air', the recent George Clooney movie and found that days later I was still thinking about the adorable Anna Kendrick who co-starred in the movie. Her smile is that delicious. Should make Vancouver Mark happy to see me crushing on someone over 21. She is just another excellent reason to see that film.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
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