Burlesque has a 34% rating on 'Rotten Tomatoes'. Color me surprised. I hear we have the makings of another 'Showgirls/Glitter' on our hands just like I had hoped.
Sorry Christina - even with the lowest possible expectations you still showed the world what talent you had and it wasn't very much at all. If only there was a word, a German word for what I am feeling right now - a word that describes the joy I am taking from your failure, Christina.
I am sorry that you had to drag poor Kristen Bell down to the gutter with you because HER, I find appealing.
Here are what some of the critics are saying. Of course I only picked the juiciest barbs to accentuate my point:
"The movie is an affront to all things screenwriting; a package of empty envelopes at the cliche factory that actually should have every cliche filing a class action lawsuit to stop the film from using their likeness."
"It's epically contrived and, like some kind of gay Avatar, completely weightless underneath all the surface sheen."
"For what it's worth, it's probably the best 2-star movie of 2010 -- and if that's a prime example of damning with faint praise, it's nevertheless the best I can muster."
"You know how movie stars lie and say they never see their own films? The hilariously bad Burlesque would be a great opportunity to actually follow through on that."
I forever stand vigilant to protect this planet from the myriad of forces that are always against us. Be it the octopus, zombies, aliens or the robots my team of human agents, and our feline allies, circle the globe in a never ending struggle for human freedom.
I learn all I can on every subject that interests me. I especially enjoy ancient history because in the past there are valuable lessons to be found. Also, if I ever get my time machine to work properly, it would be good to know a bit about possible destinations and what to expect when I get there.
I greatly appreciate beautiful design. Be it manufactured or found naturally I am fascinated by the process of invention. I am attracted to the unique, the strange, the haunted. I like to share what I find on this blog.
And not let us forget the 'Cephalopod Menace' who, if allowed to, would wrap their tentacles around all that is good and pure in this life and crush it until it remained no more. They are creatures of pure spite. Hate is all they know. Death is all they do. They are our most ruthless and determined enemy.
So we fight. Selena has the celebrity contacts, the cat is ruthless and without pity, Roosevelt's ghost has the experience and I do the wetwork.
Fighting for the future of the planet doesn't have to be a chore, however. We can take the time to appreciate all that is cool in this world even as we cut the octopus into bite sized chunks.
This is the reason there has always been and must forever be, a Cave of Cool. Be sure to wipe your feet before you enter.