WHY? Oh Sweet Jeebus Why?

This month is only half over but I think I can already give out the award for worst fall TV show idea - the show is called CELEBRIDATE and sets up 'celebrities' with desperate for fame losers and we all get to peek in on the search for love.

First of all, all such shows like this are creepy and that is why I love them. For years I got much joy out of the creatures that were profiled on 'Blind Date'. I thought nothing could be more pathetic or desperate that that program but once again, I am happy to be proven wrong.

The first 'celebrity' to go on this new dating show is Octomom herself, Nadya Suleman. The woman who gave birth to octuplets earlier this year, has agreed to star in a reality TV dating show. Now I know she is a gorgeous woman but I don't know if these guys have really thought through the consequences of dating this freak.


*Having to take responsibility for 14 kids under the age of 6 is not exactly at the top of everyman's 'ideal' family list unless they are one of those goofy Mormons who treat their women like puppy mills.

*She looks and acts like some stunned retard in most every interview I have ever seen her do. Sitting across from her for even a short brunch would cause me to injure her with the nearest shrimp fork I could find. She has this staccato way of talking that is so off putting as to make me homicidal.

*Keeping her attention would be impossible especially if a butterfly or a shiny button crosses her field of vision.

*All you friends would make jokes about you, her and the relative tightness of her vagina. You know it would happen and you would hate it. Worse still, Nadya herself wouldn't get the jokes - EVER.

*She would need the plots of movies and television shows explained to her all the time.

*She would sing along to song on the radio while driving but NEVER would get the lyrics correct.

*She would keep you up night, begging to have just ONE more baby.

*She is a single mother of 14 who had only been on one date and had one boyfriend in her life. Yeh, she won't be clingy at all. There is no way you could ever let this woman down. Being the ONLY man to have paid some attention to her is not someone you want to be - especially when 'Loopy Louise' starts to fixate.

*Oh and she only had one rule - NO TOUCHING!

No problem. But if she keeps making those STUPID faces there will be PUNCHING.