Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Is there something wrong out in the world today? Like Dolphins swimming with cows (Dolphins can do that? - right) I have issues to speak of.
First my mother asks me if they can get fingerprints off plastic bags. I kid you not. Right out of the blue. I wonder if she is planning to just smother me one night and just be done with it.
She often jokes that she thought of drowning me when I wouldn't stop crying in the tub as a toddler. I think I will only take showers from now on.
Then Dr Oz ramps up the fear factor by discussing all the various things that can silently kill you and your family like Ebola and Anthrax because he feels it's his duty to make us all AWARE! However, he doesn't give us anyway to avoid the inevitable - just scares the shit out of people.
HEY! ASSHOLE! IF there is nothing we can do about then maybe you should go onto another topic - like showing me what my colon looks like by stuffing different colored socks into a clear tube - oh wait, that is the second half of your program?
DAMN YOU OZ!
Posted by Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness at 12:25 PM