My Apologies Again

"I know you thought that this would be a cute Halloween costume and amoung a certain crowd I assume it is. I admit to having a few bowls of punch before you arrived. Personally, I blame the guy who was standing next to me for your injuries. Had he not decided to dress as a baseball player (complete with Louisville Slugger) I would not have had anything to beat you senseless with. Granted, I should have realized you were not an ACTUAL cephalopod when you did not bleed ink. In my defence, the lighting in the Elk's Hall was very bad and my anger temporarily filled me with what experts call 'blood rage'. May I suggest that next year you go as a sexy nurse or something less 'provocative'. That is if you are out of hospital by then. Happy Halloween. Love, Calvin."