Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Were The Hell Did November Go? I Blame Noah Because That Story Is Just So Stupid


To celebrate how predictably crazy the world has become, I offer this new headline -

"Full-Scale Replica Of Noah's Ark Planned for outside Cincinnati"

First of all, CINCINNATI???? Secondly, I thought Noah built this by himself. God did not say "Go forth and subcontract your neighbors to help you".

You know that once they get it built they will stuff it with diseased zoo animals down into the bowels of the Ark, away out of the sun because I don't remember the boat ever having portholes.

How sucky would it be as a kid to have THAT be your family vacation? I would have begged my folks just to stay home or ditched the whole family wagon at the first gas station.

Have I ever mentioned how stupid I find the whole 'Noah's Ark' story? I think I might have.

The Creation Museum will announce details Wednesday afternoon of its planned expansion.

Answers In Genesis, which built and operates the religious-themed attraction, plans to build a full-scale wooden replica of Noah's Ark based on biblical descriptions.

The $24.5 million project will be constructed by the same team that built the Creation Museum.

The religious ministry is soliciting online donations to help construct the project, which they expect to draw an estimated 1.6 million visitors per year.

Ken Ham, president and CEO of Answers In Genesis, cites poll data showing that an estimated 63 percent of Americans would visit a full-scale replica of Noah's Ark if one were built in the U.S.

7 comments:

csmith2884 said...

"an estimated 63 percent" Holy crap that guy has been to close to Willie's bus! If God ran for office 63 percent would not show up.

Kal said...

Nice. I like that comment.

Drake said...

All the drawings i've seen of the Ark it's never had a keel and built barge like (the tech of the time) and the size is way bigger than anything ever built up till then and how did not capsize?
Science, math and ship building tech can't make it float,especially in 40 days of stormy seas.

I know their answer will be "It was made by God and so he made it work" but don't you think God would have come up with a better kickass design?

Kal said...

God would have turned it into a nuclear sub with a flying sub that allowed Noah and his aquanauts to explore the water logged world. Thanks for giving me more ammunition for my Noah is stupid arguement.

Unknown said...

What a freaking waste of time and money! It's going to be a smelly eyesore.

DrGoat said...

Think what you could do with that money to actually help people, like christians are supposed to do.

Nathan said...

Just you wait! They'll have the last laugh when God floods the Earth again, and you scoffers drown!

Oh, wait. Genesis says that God promised never to do that again. Never mind.