Sunday, August 30, 2009

Final Destination 3D


Now I want it known up front that there are many 'horror' franchises out there for one to enjoy. You got your 'Halloweens' and your 'Friday the 13th' and your 'Saw' or 'Hostel' type movies. Any of them are worthy to invest your fandom into. For me, the franchise of the genre that I like the most are the 'Final Destination' movies. Less sadistic than the 'Saw' movies (which I DO appreciate for its artful devices of death), they nonetheless craft a cacophony of totally illogical 'Rube Goldberg' deaths in which 100 things have to happen all at the same time to create the smash or bash or splat these movies are famous for. They are like live action 'Road Runner' cartoons with groups of teens all playing the part of the Coyote. Its great goofy fun watching how kids who have 'cheated' death once realize that they are powerless before the fickle whims of fate. I appreciate the imagination that goes into each tableaux of death but do so many of them have to rely on someone forgetting to put the top back on the container of paint thinnner, or motor oil, or hair gel or wiper fluid? After 4 films they really needed to go over the top to shock and amaze the audience and this one doesn't disappoint in that respect. Its also a nice touch that they continued the 'laws of death' where there is always an order to the peril the characters are placed in. Be the first kid next to the window when you leave a doomed aircraft makes you the first one to go when the icy chill of destiny starts a blowin'. Its also gives you an out because if you can somehow disrupt the order of deaths then you can save yourself. This fourth film is in 3D which strangely seem appropriate for the subject matter. I could talk about the young actors starring in this film but does it really matter? We all know that at the end there will be a pretty girl and a handsome boy left standing to give us continuity from this film to the next. Coincidentally they will be the ones with the most lines and who portray the nicer of the character types. As I watched this I was amazed at how far special effects have come. Some of the deaths here are truly ingenious and gruesome. There really are no limits to what can be portrayed on film. If you can imagine it they can do it for good or ill. The movie moves pretty quickly though at 76 minutes we really are pushing the limit to what can actually be called a full length motion picture. I am all for economy in editing but give the people at least 90 minutes for their money or include a cartoon at the beginning (a Road Runner classic would have been appropriate). I assume they factored the time it took to show the trailers before the film to get to the full hour and a half. And one more thing. I am NEVER wearing sneakers with laces on an escalator ever again. Its a fricken jungle out there.

4 comments:

Wings said...

Haven't been to the theater to see it, but glad you liked it!

I liked the "Final Destination" flicks, as well. Not always awesome, but different and creative.

This one looks fun, indeed. And even though I am a MAJOR "Halloween" fan, my love pre-dates Rob Zombie and his "smash you over the head horror style". So I am quite glad, for the first time ever, that a "Halloween" film is being beaten in the theaters by a different film.

Robert McKinney said...

Personally, my favorite 'Final Destination' was the one on Robot Chicken that starred the Archie cast. That was hilarious.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Oh I SO want to see that. If any group of teens is ripe for a 'Final Destination' its Archie and the Gang. But can we make them 'BIBLE' Archie and the Gang just to twist the knife a bit deeper?

Nicole said...

I'm not allowed to see it. LOL I saw one of them, but my dad edited it for me... XD

Word Verification: calized (LOL Cal)