Sunday, September 19, 2010

Me Me Meme - No Wonder Noah Isn't Calling Me


WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. Last beverage: Pepsi

2. Last phone call: The bowling alley to beg them to accept me on some team.

3. Last text message: Big Daddy don't text. I didn't prefect deadly fast keyboard skills just to be reduced to a thumb communicator.

4. Last song you listened to: Naturally - Selena Gomez

5. Last time you cried: Everyday...I am gentle.

6. Dated someone twice: Yes and she stole my mother's car. I got it back thought and found out it was her with basic science.

7. Been cheated on: Yes, then showed her the door.

8. Kissed someone & regretted it: I may have regretted it but she sure didn't.

9. Lost someone special: Yes - most special - my father to cancer

10. Been depressed: Yep, but the Paxil helps and only makes me want to abuse the paperboy. I have to protect myself because he's trying to break in everyday with his newspaper scam.

11. Been drunk and threw up: many many times


LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:


12. blue

13. crimson

14. forest green


THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2010)


15. Made a new friend: not really - online but not in real life

16. Fallen out of love: oh yeh, daily - fall in love daily also

17. Laughed until you cried: many many times

18. Met someone who changed you: not really - I like to think I changed them more

19. Found out who your true friends were: known that for awhile now.

20. Found out someone was talking about you: Yup and in a totally flattery manner as it should be. I am Calvin and I run the Cave of Cool, bitch.

21. Kissed anyone on your friend’s list: I wish, some of them are gorgeous and some have those bristly beards that I love.

22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: less than I would like.

23. How many kids do you want: 6 - but that will never happen. I may find an orphanage and be able to spirit them away in the middle of the night.

24. Do you have any pets: no - the cat is a valuable companion not a pet

25. Do you want to change your name: only to my rap name - Captain Funkalicious Funk Swagger

26. What did you do for your last birthday: I was off planet at the time which was great because I hate my birthday and the rotation of the other planet never made it my birthday for two weaks.

27. What time did you wake up today: 12:30 am, slept in.

28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Protecting this fine city.

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: fall TV season

30. Last time you saw your Mother: today

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: A fine girl with some knowledge of da geek to make me laugh and who I can make laugh.

32. What are you listening to right now: Florence and the Machine

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yep

34. Who’s getting on your nerves right now: octopus

35. Most visited webpage: Calvin's Canadian Cave Of Coolness and it's Files From The Cave Of Cool Tumblr.

36. Whats your real name: Calvin

37. Nicknames: Big Daddy, Mr, H, Monkey Boy

38. Relationship Status: Happily a lonely loner

39. Zodiac sign: Gemini

40. Male or female: Male

41. Primary School: St. Elizabeth's on Base Shilo

42. Secondary School: Shilo Jr. High

43. High school/college: Camille J. Larouge - Red Deer Alberta

44. Hair color: reddish blond

45. Long or short: shaved head - and a fine shaved head it is

46. Height: 5'11"

47. Do you have a crush on someone: daily

48: What do you like about yourself: creatively funny, sweet and cuddly

49. Piercing: left ear but it's grown in

50. Tattoos: none

51. Rightly or lefty: both - especially when fencing


FIRSTS :


52. First surgery: hernia

53. First piercing: ear

54. First best friend: Donald Nahshewski

55. First sport you joined: Hockey

56. First vacation: drive through the Canadian Rockies

58. First pair of trainers: wtf?


RIGHT NOW:


59. Eating: crackers and spinach sauce

60. Drinking: Pepsi

61. I’m about to: Tumblr - watch downloaded shows

62. Listening to: Stephanie Miller radio podcast

63. Waiting for: My mighty testicles to dry after a shower


YOUR FUTURE :


64. Want kids: Orphaned so I can train them to fight crime

65. Get married: No one will ever love me that much

66. Career: teacher (again) graphic novelist


WHICH IS BETTER :

67. Lips or eyes: eyes

68. Hugs or kisses: Kisses

69. Shorter or taller: Shorter

70. Older or Younger: Younger

71. Romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous during the day, romantic at night

72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Nice ass/thigh combination

73. Sensitive or loud: Both

74. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship


HAVE YOU EVER :

76. Kissed a stranger: It was the end of an off world war so everyone was kissing everyone.

77. Drank hard liquor: Too much

78. Lost glasses/contacts: Yes

79. Sex on first date: Yes, and spent months trying to be rid of her.

80. Broken someone’s heart: Yes and my own

82. Been arrested: yes but never convicted - nothing sticks to me bitches. Suck on that Interpol

83. Turned someone down: never

84. Cried when someone died: Yes

85. Fallen for a friend: Yes


YOU BELIEVE IN:


86. Yourself : Yes, Of course. I am quite popular and famous in the fishing community

87. Miracles: always explainable

88. Love at first sight: Love yes, Lust yes

89. Heaven: don't care, I am not getting there. Made up fairy tale. No heaven, no hell, just sweet, sweet oblivion for us all.

90. Santa Claus: yes, my Father

91. Kiss on the first date: Hell yes!!!!

92. Angels: Only Charlie’s or Victoria’s


ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: no

95. Did you sing today: Yes and beautifully - you should hear my version of Hallelujah - it will break your heart bitch

96. Ever cheated on somebody: No, I would have too much guilt. I would rather be alone as I am before I did that because the last thing I want or need are two women who hate me.

97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go: Time of the Musketeers so I could dress cool and carry a sword all day. And bring them modern toilet technology.

98. The moment you would choose to relive: Actually kiss Denise. Instead of being a stupid 12 yr old kid and chicken out… Hindsight IS 20/20… But truly I would like that last year back with my father.

99. Are you afraid of falling in love: Terrific because only thing I could do is let someone else down.

100. Are you afraid of posting this as 100 truths: No, everyone on the internet doesn't exist anyway. You’re all just computer programs made for my amusement. And the ones who do exist and will read this know me pretty well already. Not like this will bring the ladies a running.

101. Five things that make you really happy right now - New season of Star Wars, the Clone Wars, Selena Gomez and her new album, Lost ten more pounds this months, new computer, joined a bowling league.

8 comments:

M. D. Jackson said...

" No, everyone on the internet doesn't exist anyway. You’re all just computer programs made for my amusement."

Ah. You've worked it out. Unfortunately you haven't gone far enough. Everyone you know in real life is also a computer program. Now, Neo, which do you choose... the Blue Pill or the Red Pill?

DrGoat said...

OK Cal, what's spinach sauce?
And someone does love you that much. Got to be. It's the odds that that person is within range is the problem.

Kal said...

Oh definately the red pill if that gets me into the matrix. Spinach sauce is spinach blended with crab, miracle whip, lemon, oregana and eaten with fresh french bread or swiss cheese crackers.

Kal said...

Well we don't know yet Dr. Goat if my Ukrainian farm girls got my care package.

Siskoid said...

Where does that Uber-Stalin come from?

DrGoat said...

Could I substitute Mayo for the Miracle Whip? Never could stomach that stuff. Other than that, it sounds devine.

Kal said...

It's just a binding agent so yeh, you ahead wit your Mayo.

Which Uber-Salin - me or Noah? We both live a few blocks away from each other in joining subdivisions.

Pat Tillett said...

Lot's of info there...Most of all, I'm glad to know you consider your cat a companion and not just a pet.
Cats are worthy of that...