Monday, September 13, 2010

Love Me Some Maury


I have to admit to loving trash television and daily TV doesn't get any trashier than Maury Povich. His 'baby daddy' shows are great because there is nothing more entertaining than seeing some girl who slept with 10 guys (in the small window it takes to get pregnant monthly) have to bring each of them back in turn to see if they are the father of their child. And nine times out of ten the guys are not really the kind of men they want to be a Dad in the first place so I blame these stupid girls for not using SOME protection.

Often some goober who can't bother to use a condom gets zinged by several girls on one show. The look on his dumb ass face is priceless too.

Then there are the guys that show up thinking they can beat a lie detector test. I keep thinking of that line from 'Seinfeld' where Jerry asks George how to beat the 'poly' - "It's not a lie, if YOU believe it."

But none of these idiots can beat the machine and they often also get caught kissing some decoy girl in Maury's 'Green Room` along with being caught for the lies they have been telling. Have they even seen the show before? Do they really think it is just their lucky day that this incredibly hot chick is alone with them and is also willing (within ten minutes of their charm) to flash them or make out with them? That is just too stupid for words.

But my all time favorite kind of shows that he does are the one`s about people with irrational fears. Like frogs or snakes or COTTON BALLS. How would you like to be an intern on Maury`s staff and have to spend the day being made into a cotton ball snowman like the guy above? Then you come out and scare the crap out of some poor woman until she is hypnotized and can finally hug the Cotton Ball Man. Classic.

I am evil for enjoying it I know and I am sure that the negative karma will find me in many ways so don`t bitch at me.

12 comments:

Ally said...

Dude, Maury is off the hook. I love that shiz. Did you know I interned at the Geraldo Show in college? My dream was to work on a talk show. Obviously that never came to be... Don't you think Maury needs a separate additional show called "Who's Your Daddy?" - he can do a daily show just about DNA and Dads. Right? It's so obvious he gets major dollars from the agency that does the testing!

Laura said...

We love Maury here too. I know it's bad but, I'm powerless to stop. :)

((Hugs))
Laura

M. D. Jackson said...

It takes a special kind of fortitude to watch incredibly stupid people being incredibly stupid for a whole hour. And to come back the next day for more? I just can't do it.

I don't know whether to commend you or be afraid of you.

Pearl said...

I, too, have a nasty little reality TV show streak in me. I've had conversations with people who insist that all the people on these shows are actors, that somehow it's fake. You won't get that argument from me, however -- I know those people, 95% of the time, are being genuine.

And THAT'S why it's so damn funny.

Pearl

Alison said...

My dad and I always watch Maury together. It's kind of our thing.

Out of control teens are our favorite. "You don't know me! I do what I want! I do what I want!"

Sadako said...

I have never actually seen all of an ep but after what you said about the duties of an intern...wow. I'll never complain about any job I have again. :D

Kal said...

The only people who have it worse than interns are student teachers. I know, I have tortured a few of them.

Kal said...

Thanks ladies for your support. I wish we could have a wine group where we watched the best of the weeks worth of Maury and those wacky disturbed housewives. I am such a girl when it comes to those things.

MC said...

The one where the universe explodes:

Former Out-Of-Control Team does Who's Your Daddy

Megan said...

That's still on?

Anonymous said...

Maury,one of the greatest shows of all-time

Kal said...

Still on Megan? It should be it's own network.

Thanks for that MC - when everything comes full circle it's a joy to behold.