Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Things That Make My Head Explode


It seems that Paramount Pictures is co-producing a movie on the 'life' of Justin Bieber. Of course it's in 3-D. This news comes on the heels of the announcement that Bieber will also be coming out with his 'autobiography' around the same time.

Will someone please help me understand this. Don't you need to HAVE a life to make a movie and a book ABOUT your life? It's getting a bit ridiculous here.

Unless you plan to pad these projects with stories of the time he fought for freedom for the peasants of Central America then there won't be much to say. Maybe they will tell the story of the time he got hit in the head with a water bottle and a car door from the bottle and door's perspective.

Add at least two chapters having his hair talk about what it's like to live on his head and what hairspray he prefers and maybe you got 50 pages and ten minutes of footage.

I got two words for this punk - Lief Garret. He thought he was all that too at one time and now he is in the same closet with those 'New Kids On The Block' action figures. Both seemed like good ideas at the time.

Oh lord when will the backlash come and remove this kid and replace him with someone else, anyone else. I have said this before - you can't tell me that someone out on this planet there is some kid that can do what this Bieber kid does but who is much much less entitled and annoying and lesbian looking? One bullet or a FROZEN bottle of water (this time) and all our problems will be solved. Sorry, someone had to say it.

8 comments:

Drake said...

What is he, 13? and he needs an autobio?
The changing my nappies chapters must be page-turners!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

As you said, he'll just be replaced by another young punk who hasn't actually lived yet.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Can he even spell autobio - never mind, I can't either.
Well said, though, Kal!
xoRobyn

TS Hendrik said...

That's a depressing way to start the day. Thanks Cal. lol

Ally said...

Be kind to Biebs :) I'm writing a book on him, oh and your fave, Selena Gomez. I thought of you when I was assigned that one.

M. D. Jackson said...

In ten years he will be the most annoying resident of the house in The Surreal Life. He'll be breaking down in tears every ten minutes, then getting manic and crazy.

Either that or he'll be on Celebrity Rehab.

Kal said...

OMG Ally..that's like two degrees of separation to Selena. Tell her I said hello. LOL.

DrNobody said...

I was laughing about this a couple of weeks ago... Any one that thinks they need this kind of treatment for a 3D film based on their life at 16 has to have their head up their "rear end." I can see the biography deal, since they usually have those 50 page little things for all the little girls to buy on their favorite teen idols... But an autobiography?!? UGH!!