Wednesday, October 23, 2019

It's Like A Freakin' Country Bear Jambaroo Out There Right Now

Why does it take so long for a dart to put a bear to sleep? Hasn't tranquilizing science advanced at all since the 1980s? And where is the SECOND trampoline? You plan this circus stunt so high up in a tree that you need a guy on a cherry picker to actually DART the bear. What did you think was gonna happen? The branches and a swarm of robins would carry said bear gently to the ground. I admire the trampoline idea, that was inspired, but you GOTTA GO FULL RETARD on a concept so high. Plan for every possible outcome, including what we see on the footage. An airbag contraption of some type might also have helped if you were hoping not to harm the bear....which was out of question the moment you shot the bear out of the tree. You couldn't lure it down with food. Then shoot it? Just asking.

This of course is classic viral footage of a bear face planting the yard and possibly breaking it's neck.

Hillbillies and Bears. Why is it always the Hillbillies and the Bears? It's like the cartoon of my nightmares. They had a whole bear story on last weekend's LIVE PD. Now I am obsessed with their rogue bears who should go back to Zootopia or wherever bears live. Don't take your bears to town son. Leave your bears at home, Bill. Don't take your bears to town. Isn't that the song?

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