Friday, November 30, 2018

Teddy Is Ten Seconds Away From Knocking Trump The Fuck Out And Abe Is Close Behind Him


Holy Crap! I Wish I Spoke Russian Because This Looks Amazing

Set in and around the concept of open world video gaming, it follows a video game designer (Nikita Volkov) who is stripped of his identity and recruited by a mysterious force to be the gatekeeper of a multi dimensional portal. Kirill’s identity has been eliminated. Erased from the memories of everyone around him, and he will now be forced to serve as the gatekeeper of a portal that connects parallel worlds. The movie will hit US cinemas next year.

Sometimes You Tell A Little Story About Some Squirrels With A Dream


It's Official - Podbeam Is Our New Home For THIS WEEK FROM THE CAVE OF COOL

Check out our latest show and check out the whole first season of the finest new podcast online. I hear these two broken down reprobates are pretty entertaining. Who knew? Well I did but I am a genius with class and taste.


More Mutant Cows Appear All Over The Planet And I Call Shenanigans

And then of course Texas has it's own giant cow because...Texas.

And this one in Steinback Manitoba named Dozer.
It's the FOOD OF THE GODS out there. When are the super mutant chickens expected to show up? I want to be prepared. Where is the Colonel when we need him? Damn that southern racist knew how to cook a bird.

This Looks Amazing

I am loving that they are using the orignal music and dialogue and effects from the original that we all know so well. I can recide that entire movie while watching it. It's one of my superpowers.

Why Ancient Egyptians Loved Cats So Much

There is abundant archaeological evidence, however, of cats serving multiple roles. Cats were depicted protecting households against rodents and venomous snakes, but also as helpers for bird hunters and as pampered pets. Cats have been found buried in human graves, although the exact relationship between cat and human isn’t always clear. Some cats were buried with offerings, indicating that someone was planning for the animals’ afterlives. The recent discovery is one of the oldest examples to date of a cat burial.

Starting around 1000 B.C.E., gigantic cemeteries full of tens of thousands of cats became fairly widespread. The cats were elaborately wrapped and decorated, possibly by temple attendants. Roman travelers to Egypt described how regular Egyptians revered cats, sometimes travelling long distances to bury a deceased cat in a cemetery. Killing a cat may have even been a capital offense.


I Am Allowed To Miss Her


I Love This So Hard It's Starting To Hurt

I can't wait three weeks to see this movie. I just can't.

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Tru Dat


I Loves Me My General Okoye

An Epic Christmas Rant

I have always thought that Santa was a thug and a bully from the first time I ever saw this abomination of a yearly Christmas punishment. This shows you why I always loves me some Whoopie. Child, the woman is just FUNNY.

Yes, Danielle Is Still So FOIN!



Best Upcoming Movie Trailers

I am sorry this one includes Dumbo. I hate that freakin film. I hate it's unrelenting sadness. In many ways Disney had an obsession with parental death and the horror that follow that horrific kind of event. I don't care if I ever see anything Dumbo related cruelty for the rest of my life.

I Hate You Marvel Films.

Hey Internet and Marvel Films, stop being such corporate assholes and give us the EXACT date and time when we can at least see a full trailer for INFINITY WAR which also is know as AVENGERS 4. You do not need to tease the world with something you all have seen but like a psychopath you love the game of torturing us with drips and dribbles of rumors and weak 4 second teasers. It's all bullshit and planet Earth wants it to shop. Just give it to us ALL AT ONCE you corporate maniacs. I support and praise what the creative people have done with this two part film. It's the marketing drones who let us all down. So we wait until the madness that is the Superbowl where their commercials are banned from being seen in Canada each year and where they will spend an insane amount of money into a one time spot that gets more views and massive repeat views online. Assholes. Why not give us an early Christmas present like this trailer for the AWESOME looking Aquaman. A Month away and I am insane for it. I want to love you just as much, Infinity War II. Why get lost in the Superbowl sludge when you can shine like a Christmas Tree star?

This Era Actually Existed

And is that asparagus on that plate?
Am I a Royal now?

Caroline, I Think You Are Trying To Seduce Me

This is the look she always gives me when I take her into another dangerous monster filled adventure.

What The Hell Is With That LOOK, Tarzan?

You look just hammered and now you have to explain to Jane why you were out drinking with those irresponsible monkeys on a school night again. Bad form for the King of the Jungle. King of the Blood Alcohol Level is more like it to me. He needs rehab but where do you find a good place in the Jungle that is not just some insurance scam? You don't. You need to move to the big city to find reliable treatment centers.

Cosplay Of The Week