World On Edge And Cal's Head Explodes Counting Luftballoons

This is an example of how committing something to video can come back to haunt you years down the line. This song by 'World On Edge' is nearly unwatchable because of all the pretentious mugging going on with the band and a director who thought he was making 'art'.

It's always the people in the lizard costumes that let you down in the end. You see, because it's the rain that makes them come back to life in the arid desert. Why not just get some REAL lizards that are native to the area from a local pet store and have some production assistant splash them with water from off camera? See, I have already made this crappy video better in less than 2 seconds. Imagine what Big Daddy could do with a half hour to work on the thing.

Think of the future children, think of the future.



The sound is not the greatest but I just couldn't use the live version. Check it out yourself and you will know why. The armless shirts, the Michael Bolton hair styles, the sound of instruments that NO ONE IS PLAYING! GAH!

This video is no better - let's have some fun and list all the reason why this video is lame - grizzled prospector with eagle feather, lead singer in love with his own hip swaying and restrained gestures, rattlesnake, everyone looking around confused because the bus went back to the city without them, girl with turquoise wings asleep on horse, girl with turquoise wings under tiny waterfall, lead singer asking god to 'wash the rain' and kill him with a dignity restoring lightning bolt, black choir in white robes singing background vocals at sunset, band walking along river bed without lead singer in attempt to distance themselves from ridicule, same winged girl (this time a blond with white wings), slow motion running to blond winged girl, cow head skeleton with horns, shirtless black drummers with golden arm bands playing bongo drums at sunset, electrical instruments not plugged in, lead singer in waterfall getting his hair wet (see he 'washed the rain'), we all puke, the end.

How can I like a song but hate the video? This is why the 80s were so great. Most times the video you had in your head for a new song was never anywhere near the actual video that was released.

My friends and I would try to make our own videos in our heads and then describe our genius to each other. Most times our ideas were so much better. Then again we smoked a fair amount of da ganja back then so most of my ideas included a yellow happy face balloon. Don't judge me! That idea was a winner I tells ya, A WINNER!

Some songs need more cowbell and some videos need a happy face balloon except for Nena's '99 Luftballoons' which coincidentally has a lot of balloon references in the video and the song. Who knew? Damn Germermans. The only song EVER that is better in German than English.

And YES, before you ask, I DO want to smack the Leif Garrett look-a-like playing the keyboards. He is just so SMUG! (If you don't know who Leif was, children, I beg you NOT to Google his name. Some things just can't be UNSEEN. All you need to know is that he was the Justin Bieber of his day.)

Nena at least made a mention of 'Captain Kirk' which for some reason does not translate into German. OOP ACK!

I counted and there does not appear to BE 99 Luftballoons. Couldn't someone have picked up exactly 99 Luftballoons and inflated them with helium? Was that too much EFFORT? This is the exact reason the Germans lost 2 wars last century. They got a great opening but are terrible finishers. JUST INFLATE THE DAMN BALLOONS ALREADY!!!!