Friday, May 31, 2019

Recognize


"Men who are vocal about any kind of mental issues can be dismissed as weak. As inferior. As flawed, broken guys who are more likely to be ostracized for their honesty, instead of rewarded for their brav...ery. Instead of affording a fellow man compassion, we mock, belittle, and turn a blind eye. We freely spit the phrase, 'Man up,' as though your gender alone should suffice to guide you through your darkest times.Or worse: we nonchalantly respond, 'Well, that sucks,' then change the subject because talking about feelings is just too real."

My mental illness is a strength that I channel all my rage and bitterness through. It gives me the focus to commit to somekind of creative outlet that lets me vent my anger at all that I hate in this world. I don't MAN UP. I don't pretend I am not annoyed. I never get over anything. My tolerance for personal suffering in silence is obscenely low. My mental illness is my free pass to act like a maniac and actually be a pretty harmless old crank who understands the pain of the world and feels it so intensely that I can't be around others all the time. I am exhaunsting to anyone but myself. So own your mental illness and understand that.And anyone who belittles my pain will soon learn not to mistake my compassion for weakness. Because I am also a dangerous animal if pushed to far or disrespected by cruelty.




I once saw a man on fire
Staring at his window
Watching as the flames grew higher and higher
I thought that i saw him cry
Or was he only laughing
As his life went rushing on..

And maybe we're just like him..
Maybe we're all waiting
For our moment to begin

Who of us are open
Who of us have freedom really
Who of us can tell what these dark days will bring
All of us are hurting
All of us are crazy now
All of us are watching the world as it spins

I once had bird like u
A bird of prey
Still your tearing at my insides
And yesterday when you flew so far away
If you find the morning save a piece for me

Who of us are open
Who of us have freedom really
Who of us can tell what these dark days will bring
All of us are hurting
All of us are crazy now
We're crazy now..

I'll smoked a cigerette
I'll eat the flesh instead
Another whiskey more or less
Or more or less, yea
I like the drugs that sail
I love u when we fail
When we fail

I once saw a man on fire
Staring at his window
Watching as the flames grew higher and higher
I thought that i saw him cry
Or was he only laughing
Laughing..

Who of us are open
Who of us have freedom really
Who of us can tell what these dark days will bring
All of us are hurting
All of us are crazy now
We're crazy now..

All of us are hating
All of us are dreaming
All of us are watching these times of our lives
We want it all
We want for nothing
For nothing now

2 comments:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Be loud and proud, Cal!

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

I can be nothing else. For ill or good. Tis my burden to bear. And everyday I live is an FU to all the Gods who made it so.