Monday, May 10, 2010

MEGAFORCE (1982)


Barry Boswick? Persis Khambatta? Henry Silva? All filmed in the little known and seldom used NITRO VISION? Yes, kids, it's MEGAFORCE, a "phantom army of super-elite fighting men" set up to save you from teabagger tyranny around world.


Remember, its existence is OFFICIALLY denied by leaders of the free world. But there are sources to claim that such an AWESOME outfit does exist. We just never see them or capture them on film.

Their tech and vehicles look like a joke you say? That is just how MEGAFORCE wants you and their enemies to think, bitch. Then one day - BAM, they GETCHA!

After all, according to the opening lines, "these weapons are the most powerful science can devise." I can't confirm it but some MEGAFORCE scientist were part of that operation to cap the leaking oil well in the Gulf of Mexico. PHEW. That has got to work if MEGAFORCE is working on the problem because as their slogan says - "Deeds, not words"


Back in the day you could actually JOIN MEGAFORCE and be as awesome as ACE HUNTER - the headband wearing leader of MEGAFORCE. And only the greatest hero deserves one of the great movie villains - Henry Silva. Ah the Silva, the eighties answer to Hitler in the movies. He may have been in a lot of crappy films but he never did anything but play the villain over the top in all their scene chewing glory.


So even though we can't stop Silva and his evil goons by using REGULAR armies or diplomatic channels, we still have MEGAFORCE who don't believe in your stinkin' borders.

Can you believe this one opened the same day as a little seen movie called 'Blade Runner'. What ever happened to THAT flop?

See all those lights on the computers in the control room? That means that those are those high tech SUPER computers we always hear about. Only the best for MEGAFORCE.

Oh, look. Persus and Barry have an aggressive first meeting just dripping with sexual tension. She don't like his wild style, his wild hair, or his wild headband. Somebody has got a crush!

"We know you. You are the doctor with more degrees than a thermometer."

That is just GOOD writing.

I am sad that the government of the country MEGAFORCE was trying to help called off our boys. Time to just pack up and go home. What? MEGAFORCE is going against their orders? MEGAFORCE is just going to get the job done? Damn you ACE HUNTER. You were told to stand down. We will have your headband for that.

Ace - "There are some things you can't put a price on."

Silva - "If you would have said anything else, I would have been disappointed. I love you. But you are HOPELESS."


Does Ace live and become less hopeless? Is MEGAFORCE destroyed by betrayal? Does Ace's headband leave tan lines from the desert sun? Is all of MEGAFORCE just a cover so it's members can do business as rentboys?

Watch and see.

(P.S - you know that MEGAFORCE is super secret because even spellcheck doesn't have that word in their datbase. "MEGAFORCE GO!")



14 comments:

Copyboy said...

Barry in spandex? Sounds like a can't miss hit formula.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Well it's not a 'hit' formula but the proper word to describe it rhymes with 'hit'.

M. D. Jackson said...

It should have been a TV series. It could have been a companion show to the A Team. They could have done a crossover episode.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Why do you hurt me with dreams that cannot be?

M. D. Jackson said...

Somewhere there is an alternate universe where all these things are true.

I take comfort in that.

Pat Tillett said...

It's amazing that ACE HUNTER can still find hair product in the middle of saving the world...

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

What are you saying, Pat? Are those wild locks created by 'products'? It's not natural? No! I refuse to believe that. And you are just mean for suggesting otherwise.

M. D. Jackson said...

Yeah, but in some universe there is an MD Jackson that is selfish, lazy, drinks too much, eats too much, has no money and...

...oh, wait, that's...

...uh... never mind

Sam G said...

I remember reading an interview with the producer back in the day and he said that Megaforce would be the talk of the Summer. Everyone would refer to things as Mega-this and Mega-that. Unfortunately Megaforce was released the same Summer as "E.T."

ThoughtCriminal said...

I learned that motorcycles can fly and you can take out a Soviet tank (well at least the export versions) with Estes rockets. Did I forget to mention that the good guys always win?

Booksteve said...

Always thought Bostwick looked like John Phillip Law in this.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

He does doesn't he. Maybe that is why I give this goofest a pass. You know how much I loves me some John Phillip Law.

Nathan said...

Of course "Megaforce" isn't in the spellcheck! If you look at that poster, it's obviously two words. Or maybe just one word with a capital letter in the middle, but that's definitely supposed to be a capital F.

The Man-Cave said...

Wow Megaforce. Haven't heard that word in some time and haven't seen the film in even a longer time. This film and Xanadu killed Beck's career following his awesome turn in The Warriors. Silva was...well Silva here. When I think of him, I think of the Buck Rogers movie, his Quint parody in Alligator and of course this role here. Nice post Cal.

BTW - that last poster looks like what one of those trading card wax wrappings would have back in the day. Which asks the question of whether or not there were Megaforce trading cards and if there were, were they buried next to the E.T. Atari games?