Sunday, July 29, 2012

What Have I Told You Numnuts About Building Phone Operated Killer Robots?

A Japanese electronics company has unveiled a 13ft super-robot which can be controlled by an iPhone.

But be careful with the jokes if you are on the phone to the pilot as the robot, made by Suidobashi Heavy Industry in Tokyo, brings a whole new meaning to ‘trigger-happy’.

'Kuratas' is fitted with a futuristic weapons system, including a gatling gun capable of shooting 6,000 BB bullets a minute, which fires when the pilot smiles.

What happens if I frown, fart or make that 'duck' face?? What get's released then...aside from my dignity?

Kuratas, made by Suidobashi Heavy Industry, can be controlled either through the one-man cockpit or from the outside using any smartphone connected to the 3G network.

ANY smartphone? That doesn't sound safe nor secure. I would prefer some kind of password before any weaponry could be unleashed on the general public. Call me old fashioned but these kind of machines have a way of going all hinky once they have been activated. I would like some kind of OFF SWITCH should it start thinking and getting ideas of it's own.

Why would anyone, aside from a drug dealer, foreign dictator or rap singer need with a killer robot that can fire 6000 bullets a minute? What is the practical real world use of such a thing aside from it being some rich asshole fuck's new toy? When he gets tired of shooting at things that are not alive he will want to shoot at things that do move around. People move around. This stupid thing seems designed to do only one thing - destroy.

Being about to do it with a smile is a nice sinister touch.

That being said it would be REALLY cool to shoot at icebergs while encased in a floating version of this bad boy. And they should make one that can go into space or deep inside the earth. It should also come with rocket engines that allow the occupant to fly.

Imagine a whole planet of these one manned vehicles. Each on a mission to protect their part of the planet from whatever comes out of the random worm holes that are opening on Earth. All manner of monsters want to invade us from a multitude of dimensions and these vehicles are the only things that can get to the site of a worm hole opening fast enough to blast it shut. They also have the firepower to deal with whatever may come over from the other side - at least until planetary forces could be mobilized.

Of course each robot would be personalized to the preferences of their owners. Each would be equipped to survive in any extremes of weather or temperature and keep their pilot occupant alive at all costs. I see the pilots having an almost symbiotic relationship with their robots. You could also give the robots personalities like the Transformers have. They would all be connected by some planetary command post but would be able to operate independently of any central command.

There, I wrote you kids a million dollar idea - now go make me that movie!

You can read the complete story HERE.


Nick Ward said...

Mine is currently on order. I will have it linked to my Facebook and whenever someone posts a status that ends with "if you agree then repost this" or "70% of people won't repost this" then the robot will automatically unfriend them then go around to their house and fire 600 rounds of uranium enriched bullet casings into their domestic dwelling.

Kal said...

But but...that will wreck all their stuff. They will have to get more stuff after cleaning up the old stuff they had before you destroyed it.