Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I Am Such A Loser For Losing The Admiral

I was suppose to go get a new color printer today and a card reader so I can get the pictures off my digital cameral and print them up in color and put them all over the side of our fridge. Mostly pics of the neice of nephew from my mom's recent trip to the continent of death, Australia.

There are a great many pictures of Admiral Fluffy that I will print up as well even though I don't know if I want them hanging up around me. I have some old rolls of film from when he was a kitten in my treasure box that I am so reluctant to get developed. I think all that stuff would break my heart if I saw it right now.

I know to many of you my obsession of the loss of this cat seems silly. However, to me, our relationship was very mutual and full of lots of good times. I know that during warm and cold times that I made him feel safe and fed and comfy and loved. He was pappered and cared for like he was royalty and to us he really was. He was a gentleman and a prince of a cat and he deserved nothing less.

I will do a much larger obit (without a body I might add) after I collect many more pics from the digital camera to tell a much better story of one of the great cats of all time. My father once told me that if in the end, you can say that your pet was a good cat, then that was the hightest praise ever and guaranteed entry over the 'Rainbow Bridge' for him/her.

I really miss my best boy. He was my 'schnupe'.


Captain Temerity said...

Silly for missing and loving your cat?? God no!

After we bought our house, Dante, my cat of (now) 13 years got out by escaping a spot in the garage I didn't know about. He was gone for a week, and I was despondent every second of it. We walked the whole neighborhood multiple times looking for him. We handed out treats to the cats we met, hoping they would... I don't know... get the word out.

Finally, one morning my fiance was sitting on the front step, and a whole pack of cats came walking up the street. Then one broke off from the lot, and walked up to her. It was Dante. They'd brought him home.

I love being able to tell this story, because it sounds wonderful. But I am constantly terrified of losing him again. That whole experience really weighs on me. Losing a friend is losing a friend. I hate the fact that you have reason to grieve, but you do so as long as you need to.

Kal said...

I hope my kitty has buddies like yours. I can only hope for a Disney ending to all this. I will have plenty of time to despair when all hope is gone. It's just said to see him go this way where I never know if he was just sick or what happen. I hate to speculate. Thanks for your kind words.

GoblinTown said...

I have to disagree with your title. From the sounds of it, you two had a very happy 14 (I believe)years. Seems like he was well taken care of and loved by you and gave you plenty of love in return. In my opinion, over a decade of love and good times is nothing to sneeze at.

I know it's no consolation, but I have been in similar circumstances a few times and I feel for you, it hurts like hell. I wish you the best on this and hope he comes back.

Either way, you can't deny that you were good to each other and there was a lot of love there. I can't speak for anyone, but I know I wouldn't want those that love me beating themselves up about me when I'm not around. I would hope they would remember the good times that we shared and what we meant to each other.

Stay strong, friend.

Sam G said...

Silly? Hell no. Like I commented earlier, I know what you're going through.
I'm still hoping.

Margaret Benbow said...

You are right to still hope, because sometimes your wishes come true. When I was a child our much-loved dog Medi went missing during the bitterest part of a terrible winter. We searched for her all over the countryside with breaking hearts. Finally after a week we tried to accept that she must be dead. On that day she came limping home, very gaunt and traumatized, but alive. We never knew what happened, but we had our Medi back. I pray that will happen for you.

DrGoat said...

It is not an obsession and it is NOT silly. This is a loved member of your family. And I still have hope he will return to you.
I've lived a fairly long time and I've lost 5 very good friends over that 60 yrs. There's a 24 yr old kitty named Cootie that passed away a few yrs back that I still think of almost every day. Sending many good vibes to you and Admiral.

DrGoat said...

I wish they sold insurance for broken hearts. I would pay the premium.

Mow said...

I got my Miss Kitty. and I had Itsy. He was a little tuxedo cat, an itsy bitsy thing (guess where his name came from?).

Then he grew into a 15 lb terror, nicknamed Monstercat. There are gouges on the hardwood banister where he'd climb up onto.

He took a walk and never came back one year ago today, as a matter of fact. I thank him for the fun times we shared, and how he comforted me when my mother died. He would groom my beard to try and make me feel better.

If the Admiral was any kind of personality like Itsy was, I'll bet my last kibbles 'n' bits another family is spoiling him rotten.

I'm still rooting for him to find his way back home.

Wings1295 said...

Hope he's back soon!

Wings1295 said...

Hope he's back soon!

Sarah said...

Definitely NOT silly to love someone that much.

And I say someone not animal because they really are people when allowed to live with you, share your life that closely, develop & show their own personality and traits and show you affection in return.

They may not speak English but most communication is non-verbal anyways, and after a short time with a special friend you can read what they're telling you without benefit of words.

NEVER think it's silly to love them that much and mourn when they leave your life (even though I still have faith that he will be returned to you).

After all, the Admiral wouldn't think it was silly to love you in return, would he?