Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Fed Up!


We have had this discussion many times. I just read back my last page of posts and frankly I was tremendously entertained. You be gettin' good blog there bitch.

I don't need your comment. I don't want your comments. I don't even want to know you are out there. Just continue to selfishly take a little bit from my soul each time you visit and walk away with your smiles and your joy and all the other life affirming and enriching things you get from visiting the ol' Cave of Cool.

The cat is fed up with you all too. He just isn't polite about things like I am. Trust me when I say you don't want to read what he typed earlier. Luckily I came out of the bathroom and deleted his post before it went viral. Now I have to explain to HIM why HE got no comments either on what he added to the richness that is my blog. I will just blame you all. He knows how you have let ME down so he will buy that excuse.

If you were worried that I would stop leaving comments on YOUR blogs then you should not fear. I appreciate the sharing and the commitment to quality that each and every one of you put into this labor of love we call the blogosphere. You are all remarkable, unique individuals and you inspire me daily. I can't imagine not supporting you vision or not respecting the gift you give me by allowing me this insight into your lives. I know what it is like to feel like you are screaming into the wind from a deserted island. Know that I hear you from my leaky little boat offshore.

I am a man without a cell phone or a twitter account. I have few real moments of validation in my life. Aside from letting that snotty paperboy live another day I don't affect the 'real' world much. My imprint on this planet is slight. I will die without children or a single undamaged major organ or organ system. There is no NEED to sign that part of my licence that authorizes organ donations. I will not live on.

So now I will take my Michelle Trachtenberg and leave you. We have a reservation for Beer and Bratwurst in Baden-Baden that I don't want to be late for. I thank you for your time and attention to this matter.

Calvin

Calvin's Canadian Cave of Coolness

p.s. - PLEASE don't leave me comments telling me things I have heard before. I can predict what you will say before you say it. Really. Go about your business. Move along. Nothing to see here.

31 comments:

Jeremy H. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Did you READ my post?

Drake said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

I have no idea what that means Drake.

Mike said...

I check out your blog every day, and I am seriously entertained 90% of the time. Very funny and very fun.

vancouver mark said...

London Drugs has Purex toilet paper on sale this week,
That damned wart thing on the bottom of my foot just won't go away,
I have to get through three more days of "phase one" before I can go back to eating oatmeal 'n Alpen for breakfast,
AND
That really was a plasma ball the missionaries saw over Haiti the night before, meaning the whole earthquake really was a savage reaction to that freaky Norwegian spiral last month.

But you knew I was going to say all that, didn't you??

MJenks said...

I was going to leave a comment, but then you said that we shouldn't, so I decided to flip you the bird and go check out more pictures of Michelle Trachtenberg.

Meow, in deed.

TS Hendrik said...

Isn't your cat like 105 in people years? I don't see it as any threat. More like a grumpy grandfather who is woken up long enough to yell at those 'derned kids on his lawn.'

DrGoat said...

We in Tucson like you Cal. If the Brats and beer don't help, try a Percocet. I know you have a pharmacy or two up there. Our cats read your cat's blogs all the time.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

My thanks to Tuscon. And NOW the cat is taking credit for my blog behind my back? He is such a coat tail rider.

And yes Dr Goat, we do have pharmacies up here. The are full of gumball machines that dispense valuable medication upon demand. Unless of coure if we order home delivery. Then you have your choice of sled dog delivery or dropped from a small plane by parachute. Lots of our elderly can climb trees like Lemurs

Oh and TS. 105 is young for a Canadian kitty. Mock him at your peril. It's out of my hands now. He could be contacting you shortly about this matter.

Jeremy H. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pearl said...

Personally, I was in love with you since that day your dropped the roofie in my drink and TOLD me how much I loved you.

Remember that? No, I don't either. Thank God we have the pics, huh?!

Pearl

Laszlo Brown said...

Iconoclast.

meheart said...

I love you too. It is your own fault for being so Interesting and Cool. Who among us mortals could compete?

Unknown said...

at least my comment won't contain anything about tentacles

http://www.craphound.com/images/zomboct.jpg

Steve LeCouilliard said...

I check out your blog pretty regularly. There's almost always something cool to look at or read.

I kind of got used to not getting comments on my own blog. I have a few friends who post, but not very often. That's just kind of the way it is.

Anyway, please don't stop posting. I know I'd miss you.

vancouver mark said...

Hey, you should at least still come on MY computer. I know you always enjoy, appreciate, and whole-heartedly agree with MY comments.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Pear, I suggest we connect those pictures so to show the yuounger childran how we met and loved at the edge of teh age of man.. Then show theam all the romcom to iffuriate them to take flashing torches to the cave of love.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Vacouvare Mark you can find some punk off a hasting to live in your grage wit his applle 2ee that could easily fack my style and whit. Any monkey can do that. Thats why I have stopped posting..until I hear the correct words in the corrent order. I hope I don't beome likek howard huges and story my urine in bottotes. oooofs too later.

vancouver mark said...

Shit, Cal's barricaded himself in the cave with all the liquor!

after that he may drink the urine

this could take a while.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

YOu understand snothing aobut how fermentting one's urine with nyquil and th sweeet honey cheerry blossums can create the finest MEAD that any bitter dwelling crazy made global leader. And since on I and the cat have thre key cold all you bitches are out of luck,.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

so I hope you see, Pearl how we can defend nay of he mouthbreathers atempting to interupt or carnubial pressures. Pluse I have 800 sheet of spiderman with a 1000 cout of cooten blens. I saw that an some peasants of your own to beat with stilck sticks...don' say know befo0re waching into a good ten or so o fthem....they litke it therely do.

Jeremy H. said...

man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder and a lead pipe in the other and sits down and asked the bartender for a screwdriver and a bottle of cherries... what the hell kind of night is it going to be for this guy... or the monkey... my question is what kind of monkey is it?

Margaret Benbow said...

You haven't posted since Wednesday--now I'm worried. Maybe that devil woman Michelle has you lying in a lubricious stupor, all zoned out from her brats and her beer and her Jezebel embraces. PLEASE COME BACK TO US CALVIN!

DrGoat said...

OK Cal....I think you have been hitting those pharmacutical gumball machines a bit too hard. Everything in moderation (did I really say that?) We want you back. The right words in the right order is a hard prescription to fill. Maybe with a 1000 monkeys typing away at 1000 typewriters.
Come back Sheba, come back!

vancouver mark said...

Cal, Calvin, we got Selena, Cal, we got her right over here. Just put down the urine, Cal, come out of that cave, and let's talk.

Here, Selena, you say something...

Margaret Benbow said...

Michelle (I knew there was a reason I never liked her) probably has him bound and gagged and is approaching with the canola oil this very minute. STAY ALIVE CAL, NO MATTER WHAT OCCURS! WE WILL FIND YOU!

DrGoat said...

OK, We will get rid of the FreeCreditReport.com guy. That and Vm has Selena, so whatda you say?

vancouver mark said...

This looks bad. We might have to start hurting Selena.

Nicole said...

I'm sorry.