Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Really 2011? What NEXT Can You Do To Disappoint Me? You Are OFFICIALLY The Stupidest Year Of My Life And It's Not Even JUNE Yet!



Boy I am hating 2011. Not for anything happening in my life specifically but for all the stupid shit happening around me that I can only stare at in disbelief. I have had wicked insomnia this past week and what I saw a few days ago isn't helping my mind shut down anytime soon.

I speak of the terrible poster they released for the upcoming Muppet movie. It is an abomination. I can't even take the time to research my facts before spouting out some balloon juice because there can be no explanation other than the one I don't want to hear.

I agree with what Bill Maher said on his show last week. Muppets DO NOT HAVE FEET. They never had feet they never will have feet. What was so wrong with the way these 'puppets' moved in the past that needed to be 'corrected'? They are not cute with legs. They are creepy and scary. Especially Fozie.

I could take Kermit riding a bicycle in the first Muppet Movie. That was such a cool effect for a puppet that we had never seen before. Besides, we all knew what Kermit's feet looked like because they were always hanging over that wall he sat on to talk to people.

I am up to the limit of my patience for this disrespect for Jim Henson as an 'artist'. The Muppets were so great because they were the perfect combination of puppet and human working together. They were a magical illusion that is totally destroyed when you turn them into computer effects. They are better than that. The Muppets I know have SOULS. Whatever those THINGS on that poster are, I know they are as empty inside as both Olsen Twins.

11 comments:

Wings1295 said...

I think it's cool. Muppets have had feet for a long time, as I recall. Nothing surprising there to me, at all. We are very much looking forward to this here and the trailer made us even more excited!

M. D. Jackson said...

Muppets have had feet for a while. But this poster represents them in a very odd proportion. Whenever they have shown muppet feet in the past their legs have been in proportion to their bodies and it did not seem so jarring. In this poster their legs are freakishly long for their bodies.

I suspect if Jim Henson were alive he would have taken one look at this and said, "Nope. Wrong. Do it again."

Debra She Who Seeks said...

I agree, Cal. Freaky and weird looking. Muppets don't need legs and feet.

TS Hendrik said...

Did you see the trailer? How can you complain with such brilliance out there? This has all the opportunity to be the best muppet film in decades. Segel has a real respect for characters and I for one am psyched about it.

Though yeah the poster sucks, I don't think it's cause of the legs, but more because it's a horrible rewash of a bad 90's poster.

Sam G said...

Too bad Drew Struzan retired. Horrible movie poster.

Bubbashelby said...

Muppets were walking, riding bikes and dancing within the first ten minutes of the original Muppet movie. Their legs and feet are all over that thing. this poster, while not the best poster ever, certainly does nothing to diminish the magic of the Muppets, feet or no feet.

Joe Ackerman said...

while I agree with everything you say, BASED ON THAT POSTER, I'm going to give the film a go.

Kal said...

I will see it too because I see everything but I will sit on the aisle with an eye on my escape route if things turn 'bad' loopy instead of 'good' loopy which always seems to be were any Muppet project ends up.

By the way I checked out your blog for the first time today and liked what I saw. Lots of cool stuff there. You like some of the same things like I do (like 'Unbreakable' and the Mervyn Peake books that I have never heard anyone else around me even bring up that they know they exist. That doesn't happen very often with the sophisticated gang of scalawags and cut throats that I hang out with.

joe ackerman said...

cheers, mate. yeah, I seem to be the only person I know who gives a monkey's about the Gormenghast books. I don't know if you've ever seen it, but there was a pretty cool BBC four-part adaptation of the first two books a few years back. obviously, it's as truncated as you'd expect ( them two books are a helluva lot to cram into four hours! ), but the characterisation is spot-on ( except for Steerpike & Fuschia, who, although really good in their roles, are just too old ): Richard Griffiths as Swelter, Ian Richardson as Sepulchrave, Christopher Lee as Flay, and John Sessions acting his heart out as Prunesquallor. if you've not seen it, I recommend it highly.

as for the blog, I had to find somewhere else to stick the stuff that just didn't make it into Grantbridge Street! glad you like it, fella.

joe ackerman said...

oh, yeah, just in case I didn't make it clear: that Joe Ackerman up there? that's me, that is.

Kal said...

I loved that BBC Version. Really different than anything I had seen before.