Thursday, December 31, 2009

Things I Am Not Looking Forward In 2010

Before I sink into a corner and start repeating the 'Meow Mix' song over and over again here are things I am not looking forward to in the new year.

1. Celebrity - that is unearned. I have finally reached my limit with all the trapping/culture surrounding this cult activity. If only we could get rid of the little fish who try to be noticed by all the 'media' pointing out the foibles of the bigger fish then maybe our world would improve. When you start to seek out attention because you were the one night stand whore of a golfer then the wheels have truly come off the bus. Nobody cares and your parents are embarrassed for you.

More attention spent on real heroes like soldiers, teachers, daycare workers, pilots who land their planes on the water and nurses and less on grubs who bring NOTHING to civilization and use way too much of its oxygen would make this world actually livable again.

2. Lady Ga Ga - the only thing that would shock me now would be if you actually admitted you were a man before Fergie does. Your act is old and tired. You say you are giving me 'fashion' but you are actually giving me 'circus'. Like everything connected with the big top you come off as creepy and diseased. I am just waiting for someone like Simon Cowell to stand up and admit to all of us that Lady Ga Ga was a hoax and we have all just been punked.

3. Politicians who look you in the face and say that they are looking out for the 'American People' while they take money from groups who's agenda is anything but helpful to ones achievement of the 'American Dream'. I feel so sorry for my American brothers and sisters who have to live under a system that works so hard at keeping them down while perpetrating a myth that they can rise above their station. It favors one small group at the top that it enriches beyond the 'dreams of Avarice'. It's no wonder that people just give up and buy into the haters that are more than willing to co-op that anger for their own ego or advancement. Predators wait around ever corner to exploit the fears of decent human beings. How individuals continue to fight that system daily says everything about their character and the unbreakable spirit of man.

Canada may not rule the world but we seem to be a lot smarter in the way we govern ourselves. Maybe all that time spent indoors during the winter not only gives us more tolerance for others and a better sense of humor but also a determination not to allow ourselves to be given the screwgie by those in 'power' if we can do something about it. Our memory is long and what we voted in one day we are happy to vote out the next.

I've had months of medical testing done lately. Cost to me - 0.00 dollars. Peace of mind - priceless. I wish the same for everyone.

4. The Cephalopod Menace - I watched with disappointment the way many of my readers were seduced by one stinking bulbhead running across the ocean bottom carrying a coconut. It was like the most amazing thing they had ever seen. And THAT is HOW THEY GETCHA! Like a good magician they show you a trick with one tentacle while they pick your pocket (or an organ) with the other seven. It seem like another long year of predicting the end of days from my street corner soap box and that is disheartening. I could seek out some fellow squid bashers out there but I might only bring danger and unwanted attention to them and their families. There are days I wish I didn't know what I know but I was chosen for this task because my hatred is pure and justified but not righteous! If I cross that line I would hope that someone would take me out of the picture. My worst fear is being seen as a holy man.

5. Tiny pets that wear costumes/clothing. It always makes the list because its just so stupid. I can't help myself for these feelings.

6. Being alone another 12 months. 'nuff said.

7. Over hyped and overblown motion pictures like 'Avatar' which left me feeling like you do after eating candy for dinner. It's a nice idea that in the end you regret it. Such beautiful to the eyes but did nothing for my brain and seemed like an opportunity lost. How can a movie like 'District 9' seem so fresh and 'Avatar' seem so stale? One word - STORY. You can spend all you want on effects but if you don't have something interesting to say I am not going to enjoy the experience. However, saying all this means nothing because the box office numbers are the only thing that matters so get ready for 'Transformers 3' and say goodbye to your soul.

8. Superbugs that are pretty much resistant to any antibiotic we have out there. Scientists discovered one pathogen that mutated 12 fold and became 'impossible to kill'. That is just great. Like the aliens from 'War of the Worlds' it will be the tiny germ that takes us all down. All this time I suspected the octopus would be responsible for our doom but I guess I was wrong. Thank you science, thank you medicine and thank you Sir Alexander Fleming. Where is your 'penicillin' now bitch?

9. More disappointment from Barack Obama - I am so getting the feeling that he is not the savior we all hoped for. He makes terrific speeches but can't close the deal. He is timid and afraid to use his power lest he make someone mad at him. Bush II might have been a nutcase but he at least 'acted' on his principles no matter how batshit insane they were. Obama is inert and his ONE term will haunt him for the rest of his days. He will only realize after he is gone that he squandered his opportunity to truly change the world.

I am just waiting for the back patting that will come when he signs the awful health care bill which only cements the power of the insurance lobby and big pharma and FORCES people to buy worthless insurance that will give them less protection than they had before. Every asshole politician will tell us that they did right by the American people but that isn't the truth. Banks will be more unregulated than ever and the US recession will continue to affect us here in Canada since our economies are so intertwined. Good luck having another minority President after that. The money men and their evil cabal will win because they always win. People like Hannity and Colter and Matlin will continue to rewrite history THAT WE ALL LIVED THROUGH and never be challenged. FUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! Why the hell is this allowed to continue????

I am less hopeful for this new year as I have ever been in my life. 2010 - the year everything went to crap. Thanks alot planet Earth. You are now NUMBER 2 on my list of favorite planets ever.

10. Batman's (Bruce Wayne's) return to comics. Since the end of 'Final Crisis' when Bruce supposedly died we have been waiting for his return. The last panel showed him in prehistoric times having been sent there by some voodoo after Darksied killed him with his Omega Beam. I do like the idea of him moving through time and adopting a different design of his Batman identity to fit the various time periods he is in but I could have waited a few more years to see that. How can I miss him if he won't go away. They just made Dick Grayson (the first Robin) step into the shoes of his mentor and it's nice to see. Bruce's son Damien is a damaged Robin and the dynamic between the two is really good. I want it to go on and not just stop as Bruce takes back his role and identity and Dick goes back to being Nightwing. We all know its going to happen eventually but let me at least enjoy the new status quo for awhile.


Wandering Coyote said...

Another great list, Cal. I am so with you on #6.

Wings1295 said...

#6 is pretty sad. :(

And I am with ya on Batman. Give it time. Make his return meaningful and shocking. But, will they listen? Nooooooooo.

Anonymous said...

Man, you are so right. It's like you are reading my mind on several of these points. I didn't think I was alone, but it is nice to actually see some one else say the things I'm thinking and sometimes post about. Wish there were a hundred million more. Then we might get some where.
and thanks for the follow also.

Nathan said...

The health care bill currently under consideration seems like a classic bait and switch to me. The original idea is that we wouldn't have to pay for health care, and now the plan is to make us pay for it even if we DON'T use it! But it's still basically the same bill, if you ask Obama.

Chantelle said...

re - #4: Have you read "Chuy and the Fish" by David Wellington in The Undead: Zombie Anthology? Three words: zombie giant squid.

re - #3: "I've had months of medical testing done lately. Cost to me - 0.00 dollars. Peace of mind - priceless. I wish the same for everyone."

That same medical testing would have happened in days or weeks, not months, in the US. You'd have paid for it (and the insurance company would be billed more than an individual without insurance) but the tests would have been over with sooner.

I'm not advocating the US health care system by any stretch.

At the same time, I envy my US friends who get their test results in no time at all and have relatively easy access to top-of-the-line doctors and treatments. I wait and wait to get the tests, then wait for results, then wait for the next tests.

Plus we in Canada don't have all the top doctors in their fields. Many of them go to the US for the money. If I want to see the best, I have to go to the US and pay for it. Since I don't have that kind of money, I'm stuck with adequate, if not great, care.

There's a balance somewhere between the Canadian and US system. I wish I knew how to find and implement it.