Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Daily Quote - 30 Rock

"You have no reflexes, your blood tastes like root beer and some of your bones appear to have vanished." - Doctor to Tracey Jordan.

I have to go see the doctor tomorrow to check out this hurt big toe that I have and I hope they don't have to cut it off because I am NOT taking that home in a jar and have it stare at me all the rest of the days of my life. I say that because you know I am not just going to leave it at the doctor's office. I am determined to leave with all the body parts I go in with no matter what form that will take.

And you can't just put the toe in a cupboard or a box and just forget it. Like the 'tell tale heart' I will hear it talking to me at night and if I don't build an appropriate shrine to my detached part. If I don't that right then it will never let me hear the end of it...the toe I mean. The toe will torment me until I take it out of the formaldehyde containing jelly jar and move it to a more classy receptacle.

I have given this subject a lot of thought as you can tell.


Unknown said...

Sore big toes are usually Gout, you will not like the new diet if it is, you may even prefer to have it removed. (not really) One of mine hurts because I smashed it on a tree stump chasing a Kangaroo on a motorbike many years ago..

Kal said...

I know. And I got it when I recently changed my diet to eat better. Nice that one life change led to another problem. Kinda discouraging actually.

I won't ask why you were chasing a kangaroo because I know what a pain in the ass they can be. They are like big mean retarded mice.

Wings1295 said...

Yoinks... Good luck!

Kal said...

I think I am not long for this world so it really doesn't matter at this point.

M. D. Jackson said...

If it is gout then it was likely a pre-existing condition before you started your new diet. You're already changing your diet to accommodate the diabetes. The tweak to the diet to accommodate the gout will not be so bad.

Or you may just have smashed it on the bedpost while fighting ninjas in your sleep.

Either way I think you will still be with us for a long time.

Kal said...

Well the diabetes medication I am taking increases the uric acid in my blood and that leads to gout (I hate that term). So the cure is creating a whole new fun experience. I may still be with you but I will be cranky.

DrGoat said...

Be as cranky as you want, just stick around OK. You got a lot of people pulling for you. Besides, you have a ways to go to catch up with me as far as cranky.
Seriously, do drink lots of water. Uric acid can sometimes cause kidney stones and believe me, you don't want to add that to the mix. I've had them (still do, about 1 every 3 or 4 yrs.) Words don't quite do justice to the way you feel trying to pass one of those.

Kal said...

Oh the fun never ends in the Cave of Cool. I have never had them. The pepsi I drink (now very much less of) keeps them at bay. That's it. I am going to dip my head in the chocolate fountain at the Black Knight Inn.

D.I. Felipe González said...

Two ideas if you ever loose your thumb:
1.-Use it to decor your keyholder.
2.-Give it a viking funeral.

I hope you have a mild gout incident. My Grandfather had gout, my dad had gout, and now I rarely eat red meat (even if I like it a lot) because I know I might get it and I've seen the consecuences.

Take care, Boreal Cal.

DrGoat said...

Drink a glass of good lemonade evry day. Keeps the stones away.