Friday, September 24, 2010


Both Brother Mike and Brother Wings sent me this story. I don't mean to say 'I TOLD YOU SO' but I TOLD YOU SO. Big tentacled bastards, hunting in packs of 1000? No that is not scary at all. Sea creatures with a taste for human flesh? Not possible I was told. Well read this....and try not to fill your diaper.

"GIANT SQUIDS ARE GIANT. How giant? Try 8-feet long and 100 pounds of pure, unadulterated (okay, slightly adulterated) killing machine. I'm never going to another (nude) beach again!

Millions of killer giant squid are not only devouring vast amounts of fish they have even started attacking humans.

Two Mexican fishermen were recently dragged from their boats and chewed so badly that their bodies could not be identified even by their own families. (WTF?)

No wonder the giant squid are called "diablos rojos" - red devils.

Since 2002, Humboldt giant squid, named after the 18th century German explorer, have been spreading their tentacles to deplete fishing stocks by moving from their traditional tropical hunting grounds off Mexico and laying claim to a vast sweep of the Pacific.

Hunting in 1,000-strong packs the giant squid can out-swim and out-think fish. Scientists believe they coordinate attacks by using pigment cells to communicate."

I didn't write the following comment but I like the way this guy thinks. He can leave on his ship but I am not going anywhere until I kill or see that are killed each and every multi-tentacled creature in the sea. They aren't forcing me off MY planet. But if they could they would and they would do that to each and every one of you and your children, and your pets and the friends of your pets. Join the revolution today. I totally need a 'Cave of Cool' brochure to distribute to the faithful and the non-believers.

See? I told you we should have filled the oceans with concrete. Now we're all as good as dead. Except me, because my rocket ship is near completion and I'm getting the f*** out of here. And by getting the f*** out of here I obviously mean exploding on the launchpad, but whatever, the point is I'm gone.


M. D. Jackson said...

I've always known those devils were maneaters. Didn't anyone see Disney's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea? Don't you remember Captain Nemo's men being tossed around the Nautilus like so much Krill? Wake up people! Wake up before it's too late!

Nick Ward said...

In February 2007, the crew of the San Aspiring were trawling the deep waters of Antarctica when they hauled up a "colossal" squid on the end of a longline. This hideous beastie is currently preserved in a giant vat of liquid in Te Papa - New Zealand's biggest museum - where it horrifies and delights in equal measure. I can tell you this much you cannot know pure evil until you've gazed into the gigantic dead eye of a colossal squid.

Kal said...

I have seen those cold dead eyes many times Nick. Thanks for the link. I will do a post on it.

Lazarus Lupin said...

I've seen the type of squid that attacked the fishermen up close. They have no real fear of people and certainly would consider us as much food as any fish.

Lazarus Lupin
Art and Review

PS, maybe I can try to do some tentacle horror pic for you someday? said...

You are even able to write humorous pieces about scary crap that makes one crap in one's pants. I like that about you, Cal.

Kal said...

Thanks's just the magic that is me.

Lazarus Lupin said...

maybe this is a little too cute..

Lazarus Lupin