Thursday, August 27, 2009

Chinese Buttered Bridges

This is why we will never defeat the Chinese. Not only do they have a 1000 year plan, but they spend all their waking hours thinking of ways to solve problems in their society that doesn't take into account (for a second) the feelings or needs of their people. Putting out toys colored with lead based paints only helps to weed out the week and inferior children who can't fight the toxicity. If you have to shoot 100 to make a point to one then that is acceptable. And if you have to grease down a bridge to prevent suicides then so be it. Only this is not done to prevent people from getting to a place on the bridge where they can kill themselves. Oh no. This is done so that the whole suicide 'drama' doesn't keep the traffic from flowing in an orderly manner. Seems that too many people were stopping to watch the spectacle of a bridge jumper and this was causing backups on the roads. Its those damn 'lookie lou's' that are causing a problem here, not the jumpers. That is cold baby....COLD!

"Bridge smeared with butter to stop suicides. Chinese workers have covered a giant steel bridge with butter because officials are fed up with traffic jams caused by people who slow down to watch suicide victims leaping to their death. Government officials in Guangzhou in south east China ordered workers to smear butter on all of the climbable surfaces of the 1,000 foot long steel bridge. Government spokesman Shiu Liang said: "We tried employing guards at both ends but that didn't work - and we put up special fences and notices asking people not to commit suicide here. None of it worked - and so now we have put butter over the bridge and it has worked very well. Nobody can get up there and anybody who tries falls. Bridge guard Wong Man said: "The butter makes the bars and frames slippery and hard to climb onto, and we can easily catch them." Since we put up the butter there have been no problems with these attention seekers. In one month alone eight people committed suicide on the bridge and numerous others had climbed up threatening to commit suicide before changing their minds. The bridge guard said: "Each time somebody threatens to commit suicide to get media attention or sympathy over personal problems we end up with several hours of tailbacks and there were lots of complaints. "Since we put up the butter there have been no problems with these attention seekers."

1 comment:

Wings1295 said...

Hey, well... If it works, it works. Maybe the people will end up getting help if they can't easily get up on the bridge.

Interesting, to say the least.